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“As we enter 2018, it might help to reacquaint ourselves with the numerology essence of the number 18, which has to do with humanitarianism, independence, and building something of lasting benefit. The underlying idea of the essence of the number 18 is the welfare of humanity; 18 is tolerant and compassionate, mixing easily with others, including planning and executing projects, yet tends to do the actions of what it considers the most important either by itself or as the leader - at its own determination.”
— Mickie Kent
In employing the numerological qualities of 18 we can all actively try to make our 2018 better. In the spirit of that, I'm going to drop 18 pointers here, which you can add to your resolutions.
Use them throughout the year, and this time round in 2019, you'll be stronger than ever. Just remember, don't thank me, thank yourself.
- Cut toxic people from your life - with love. Firmly, but kindly, explain the situation. If circumstances change, then so can your decision, but until the negativity goes, you're gone. If people aren't adding value to your life, whether it be friendships or relationships, don't be afraid to put you first and cut ties with them. It might be clichéd to say, but it's so empowering to do. And now is the perfect time.
- Learn how to accept defeat when you need to, and know when to move on. You know how the saying goes: You should fight for what you want. But sometimes you need to know when things aren't worth the fight any more. There's no shame in accepting defeat and moving on with your life. In fact, you're better off leaving behind people, things, and places that aren't right for you. Trust me.
- Declutter everything digital, including bringing your email to zero. You look at your phone and laptop every day, so they should be just as clean as your working and living spaces. Seeing an ever-growing number on anything can be stressful, but especially on your emails. The longer you leave your increasing unread emails untouched, the less likely you are to ever do anything about it. So start the year right to keep your inbox manageable throughout the year. Take it one step further. Do a total digital clean-out: Remove apps you no longer use, delete photos you don't need, clear your old laptop downloads, and change your backgrounds for a fresh look in time for the new year.
- Do a major closet clean-out. And do a deep clean of everything else, like your house, your car, and your work desk. Move from the digital clean-out to the domestic one before the professional do-over. We often put up with mess with the mindset of "I'll clean it when I have time". But the thing is, you'll never really have the time for it if you don't make time for it. If you do a major clean at the start of the year, it's so much easier to maintain for the rest of the year. Start with your closet. Just get rid of everything you don't need or don't use. Stop holding on to clothes you've not worn in the last six months or that you'll "fit into one day", and declutter your life. You'll have more space and feel a lot less guilty when you do buy something new!
- DON'T write a list of goals by year, month, and week. That's right. DON'T. Write a daily list instead. Attack the year head-on a day at a time and you'll find your long term goals will feel like they're taking care of themselves.
- Put a focus on a good night's sleep. After your declutter, decorate your bedroom and turn it into a temple of rest. Sex and rest. Both are healing.
- Put your health first, both mental and physical. There are lots of tips on this blog on how to do just that, just remember: Getting healthy for your New Year's resolution shouldn't just be focused on your physical health. Sure, running on a treadmill is great but it won't do much for your mind if you're tired and stressed. Try meditation, breathing exercises, or even talking to a professional if you feel you need it.
- Ask for help when you need it. It's not shameful to ask for assistance when it's needed, both in your work and personal life. It's not weak to ask for help, and you should get into the habit of reaching out to others when you can't do, or handle, something yourself.
- Challenge yourself by finding a new hobby or committing to learning something new. If you have bad habits you want to change, it might be time to find a new hobby to fill your time. Replace just ONE hour of your five hours of Netflix time a week with gardening, or even learning a new language. By the year's end, you'll feel accomplished that you stuck to something and gained a new skill.
- Look up at the night sky every night. Yes, really. It's a nightly manual reset. It will ground you and at the same time take your breath away. We all need more of those moments.
- Change your perspective. Perspective really is key to your happiness. In 2018, try to change your thinking, and stop comparing what you have and what you're doing to others. Or, if you're stuck in a "now" mindset, try to look at the bigger picture.
- Don't say yes to things you don't really want to do. Something I learned late this year was that you don't owe anyone anything. You're not obligated to do anything, and you definitely shouldn't feel guilty for taking time for you. If you're not in the mood to do something, or if you're too tired and would prefer sleep, you should feel confident in saying no when you feel you need to in 2018.
- Review your finances, set goals, and create a savings plan. Boring, I know, but it really is good to do. Even if your goal is something small like a weekend getaway, analysing your spending habits and finding where you have more room to save will make rewarding yourself easier. It might be as simple as eating out one less day a week for a few months to afford those shoes you've always wanted.
- Actively try to do something nice for someone every day. Think about how good you feel when someone randomly compliments you when you're feeling shitty. It really doesn't have to be anything big, but being nicer to people will not only make their day, but it'll make you feel better about yourself too!
- Buy yourself a plant. Hang on, hear me out. It sounds silly, I know, but buying something that you need to take care of will teach you responsibility and give you a routine. The five minutes out of your day that it'll take to water your plant will give you five minutes to yourself, and you don't realise how valuable five minutes of unplugged alone time can be.
- Go fuck yourself. As in masturbate. Practice physical self-love as often as possible WITH love and awareness. Dump the shame. Masturbation releases tension and is a healing process, which helps us to learn about our bodies and their emotional content. Whether you are singled or coupled, masturbation is a tool for foreplay and afterplay. Work your sexual energy with love and respect, and you'll find those so important, but often ignored, sexual energies working for you.
- Find something to be grateful for every day. Even if it seems the most insignificant thing to be grateful for, hang on to that feeling of gratitiude and nurture it. Watch it grow when you do, and reap the rewards throughout the new year.
- And leave any and all bad vibes in 2017 where they belong. Sure, 2017 had some shitty moments but what exactly are you going to gain by dragging drama from the past into the new year? Start fresh and leave all the negativity in 2017 where it belongs.
Yours in love,
