Love is Your Magic Time

Back into a normal routine after slowing ourselves down for the Easter holiday, and doesn't it seem like we have no energy to pick up our normal speed? You may have noticed that things are picking up pace and you are feeling like you cannot possibly do everything you want to do in the time you have in a day.

Unfortunately, this is a seasonal dilemma, where instead of feeling energised at the start of spring, we can feel lethargic. and even if we feel physically fine, we get stressed out agitating over whether we can fit everything into a 24-hour day.

Fret not!

Feeling like this is the norm for many of us, and there are several reasons for this. Seasonal changes brings in new energies, for example March winds blew in new energy that is strong, and is meant to push us forward. You may now be feeling like you can make up for lost time, but are pushing yourself too hard. Or it could be that the energies in the world are such that we are being asked to align with our purpose and reduce the chaotic energy even more.

You can do a few things to offset this. Experts on healing energies recommend you release inner conflicts that are keeping you from allowing things to come to you in divine timing (some are believed to be carried froward from past lives).

I'm more of the belief that we should listen to our body. It will let you know how much you can handle at one time. Honour and respect what it tells you.

Similarly, we should take time to get clarity on what is next for us in terms of our purpose in helping the world at this time. What can we do to be of benefit to ourselves and others? How can we improve our immediate environment? But more importantly, how can we find the time to get these things done?

A magic time to get more done

"Finding time to do all the things I want to do is so hard. I am just so impressed by how you manage to get so much done." I hear this comment a lot from my readers who contact me, but the truth is I have the same 24 hours in the day as anyone else does, and it's not all devoted to my writing. I'm not a workaholic. I can't be, I have a family to look after.

Usually, my workday is between 7–9 hours, just like most people. I sleep 7–8 hours. I'm outside in the garden or spend some quality time with my cats up to 2 hours per day. Add to that my 2–hour morning workout excursion (includes the round–trip commute to the gym plus my stretching and my training). And finally, like you, I have some downtime with meals, reading and relaxing, and time with friends and family. There you go, the day is done.

Crunch question: So how do I get so much done? I identify something I like to call my magic time. I've perfected my daily schedule so that I'm running on all cylinders thanks to this little secret, along with my ability to resist my email inbox well into the workday.

Knowing how to uncover your own magic time isn't hard. The good news is that everyone has their own version of a magic time to boost productivity in their lives.

I shall explain.

Now, we all have a time in our day when we are literally three times as productive as any other time of day. All you have to do is identify that time, recognise its importance, free up that time, and then ruthlessly protect it from the time vampires who try to suck it away from you.

Going back to 2004, this was when I discovered that my magic time was early in the morning, or more precisely the twilight time in between my first and second sleep. Each day at 2:30am I get up and work on my writing for two hours before hopping back in bed.

Because my magic time is at this certain time, I usually don't have to make any sacrifices to free up the magic time - unless my twin flame wakes up for some twin flame sex!

I realised this was my magic time, when articles I wrote in fifteen minutes during the twilight hours, would take me three or four times as long later in the day.

This magic time formula can really help you, too. First you have to identify your magic time. It's not hard to do, but it just requires a simple little exercise that will help you identify your magic time, as well as the habits that rob you of your time each day.

Create yourself a little me-time, then all you need to do is get a journal or notebook and write down your workday in fifteen minute increments on each line. For example, if your workday starts at 8am, you'll have a line dedicated to 8:00, 8:15, 8:30, and so on, all the way to the end of your day (and I actually recommend doing this for all of your waking hours).

Here your next task is to simply record what you are doing in each of those fifteen minute increments. If you find yourself surfing the web aimlessly at 9:15am, write that down. That's one of the bad time habits you'll need to fix.

And more importantly, you'll also begin to identify your most productive work time. For example, you might find that you can really crank out the work in the final two hours of the day. That might be your magic time. Once you identify it, the next step then becomes crucial.

Now you must foster it and protect it. You'll need to take your phone off the ringer, shut down your email alerts, keep yourself blocked from going online, and avoid all distractions.

Don't waste your magic time. Make it work for your top priority that day, because you can truly triple your productivity in this time on whatever you happen to want to achieve.

It's so simple, yet powerful. If you can use this to get more done in the limited time you have for work, it will mean freeing up more time for the activities you enjoy and the people that matter the most to you.

And take your magic time very, very seriously.

Identify your magic time. Work it. And guard it like our dog Cassie used to guard her dinner dish. Don't let anyone else get their greedy paws on your magic time. Protect it ruthlessly and you will prosper.

Next, you can also use you magic time to concentrate on cultivating your life for the better - for example in finding and using your unique abilities to bring greater success into your life.

Identify what makes you tick

So, have you ever found yourself working on something you enjoy only to look up at the clock and be shocked to see that an hour, two hours, or even longer has passed?

And if the answer to that is yes, then you might have stumbled upon your unique ability. This is something that you can do better than everyone else and often with greater ease, as well. Plus, it's something that you love to do.

Naturally, love is an important part of the equation, as you need to get to know yourself to know what you're good at. It is down to you to know your strengths and weaknesses, and down to you to play on the good and improve on the bad.

Assuming you want to do this, let's take a look at how important it is to know your ultimate strengths - unique abilities, and how you can identify and use them.

Rule of thumb: Some people have a natural sense of where their key talents lie, and what they can do or offer that is special, unique even. For others, it can be a surprise to learn that they even have unique abilities, let alone what they are. This is because so often, we don't notice that the things that come naturally or easily to us, or which we've been doing for a very long time, are actually difficult for other people, or a valuable service for others.

Start your "unique ability search" by thinking about what you're good at and what you do a lot, and what you have experience in. Next, narrow that down a little bit into what you have that is different from other people. Think outside of the box when it comes to experience, too. For example, work experience that you'd put on a résumé is far from being everything in business. Experience you may have in your family life can be just as useful, such as conflict resolution or leadership.

Eventually you'll realise it is important to know what your own key strengths are so you can optimise everything you do. Whatever it is for you, there's got to be something that first of all you're better at than most people, that your experience has helped you become even better at and really polish your skills in, and that you really, really enjoy.

Honestly, what is it that you really, really enjoy? What do you find most satisfying and rewarding in your professional life? I know a highly successful businessman who really, really enjoys strategic thinking. He loves identifying opportunity and identifying how he can capitalize on opportunity. How he can find a problem and solve it. That is what really gets him going when it comes to his working life, and so as a result he is brilliant at it. If you love a certain aspect of your work, whether it is networking, writing, creative planning, marketing, or just about anything, then you are likely to be strong in that area.

On that point, don't forget about what is it that gets you into the flow. What is it that you can do for three hours and think, "Oh my goodness, I thought only 45 minutes had gone by!"

Lastly, if there's a thing that you do that gets you into what people call flow or "the zone", where you're operating at a great speed with amazing productivity and creativity, what is it? One of the key benefits of running your own business is that you can work when it's right for you, so if you have your best ideas late at night or write best first thing in the morning, you need to know this so you can work out a routine that gets the best out of your talents.

Energise your unique ability with focus

When seeking out your unique ability, remember that for a lot of people, it is often something that you dismiss as not being important, or not being that big of a deal.

And if someone compliments you and says, "Hey, you're great with numbers. I've never seen anybody track these numbers and find hidden opportunities in them like you," this could be the identification of your unique ability. The activity that you dismiss as being easy is probably your unique ability. People tend to discount the abilities that they are good at.

Now think about positive feedback you've had in the past, or the things people come to you for in your personal life. Are you the person your friends get to check over their cover letters when they apply for jobs? Are you the person people go to if they don't understand how to do their taxes? Or are you a practical sort they ask for help if something breaks at home? I've had so many friends come to me for relationship advice, they started nicknaming me the Love Coach!

Knowing this, the chances are there is something your friends and contacts know you are the best at, that you think is nothing. So whatever it is, whether you have charisma that nobody else has, whether you're a great speaker, whether you're a great salesman, whatever you think is probably not a big deal, because you've been doing it for so long or because you had some natural talent with it, that's probably going to be your unique ability.

It is important to think about this, and appraise yourself as others see you in terms of what you can offer that others can't. The exercise will help you because when you get your unique ability then you focus on harnessing the power of it and you leverage your talents so that you get more done.

Notably, once you've identified your unique ability, you need to protect and foster it just like you do with your magic time. In fact, you'll need to focus on your unique ability talents during your magic time to get maximum results.

Gear yourself to build your work and schedule around protecting your most important talents and time. Do this by delegating the stuff that gets in the way of you being able to spend time on your unique ability, and maximizing the time spent doing what you do best.

Concentrate on the passion you have for what you do, because this is the force that drives us - the incentive that keeps you going. I say it often, but it's worth repeating - love is the force that drives us, the true focus in our lives.

Ultimately, it's about remembering that when something is done with love, this is the real magic time in our lives. You'll discover this will also help to heal your spring tiredness, and find you have much more time on your hands, with more energy with which to fill up your precious time.

Now go find your own unique ability, and cultivate it in your own magic time!

To you in love,

Love Believes in You

I had a lazy time during the Easter holidays this year. Spending it at my parents meant that my twin flame and I could chill while my mother and mother-in-law handled the celebrations.

And it reminded me of the song "People" that Barbra Streisand sings in the 1968 film "Funny Girl" (which aired during the seasonal break) where it says:

People who need people/Are the luckiest people in the world

In my mother's sewing room this morning, Streisand's voice kept popping into my head as I drank my first coffee of the day. Mum-made, in the time honoured tradition of her clan. Sweetened with organic maple syrup, whitened with coconut cream, with a dash of cinnamon added for taste, it was absolutely divine - but more so because it was made by her loving hands.

None of us are strangers to that feeling of security a loving environment can bring, even those of us unfortunate enough never to have experienced it, and carry its absence around with us for the rest of our lives.

In that quiet me-moment, I did what I always do at the start of each day, gave thanks for my blessings, and made a mental note to be even more appreciative of the gifts bestowed upon me.

Sipping my morning drink, I thought that one of my most important gifts was the one my mother had given to me: The gift of always believing in yourself.

After all, what really sets the success stories apart from the folks who struggle is belief in themselves. The question is, will you have the same never quit attitude? Will you be able to overcome the doubts that others are trying to impose on you?

Few success stories occur because the person is a super-genius. Almost all success stories are based on perseverance and a commitment and consistency to doing the work and believing in themselves. The only thing exceptional about successful people is their ability to do the work. As Thomas Edison once said,

The three great essentials to achieve anything worthwhile are, first, hard work; second, stick-to-itiveness; third, common sense.

Usually, when you get started on an idea, there are always going to be what I call, dips. That's where you struggle, and that's where some people do give up. And if you find you don't have a passion for what you're doing, then you should give it up.

Cut your losses and move on. Treat the dip as a sign that what you're currently doing is not for you. Yes, that's right. Sometimes people should give up, because what they are offering isn't right, or it's not their passion.

Know this: But with a good idea and passion, you'll get through that dip.

In so far as you believe in yourself.

Never let the limiting beliefs of others get in the way of your success. Instead, stick to your beliefs, persevere, and never give up on something that you know is right for you.

Go for it; that's all you can do when no one else believes in you.

Criticism can be profitable

Unfortunately, one of the most surprising and disappointing things about reaching an important goal is that many people won't share your happiness when they hear about it. Some will even criticise your achievement.

Nevertheless, what's important, I've found, is not the criticism itself but how I react to it. Praise motivates me to do more of what I'm doing. Criticism - which used to make me want to quit - spurs me to examine what I'm doing and see if I can do it better. In this way you can profit from it.

To illustrate further: Feedback is very useful for telling us where we are. Without feedback we couldn't have results. We couldn't keep score. We wouldn't know if we were getting better or worse. Just as salespeople need feedback on what's selling and leaders need feedback on how they are perceived by their subordinates, we all need feedback to see where we are, where we need to go, and to measure our progress.

Acknowledge, however, that negative feedback can be employed by others to reinforce our feelings of failure, or at least remind us of them - and our reaction is rarely positive. Worst of all, negative feedback can sometimes shut us down. We close ranks, turn into our shell, and shut the world out.

Now I was lucky in that mum taught me strong self-belief, that I had the power and skills to be anything I wanted to be, but some of us are not that lucky. Some of our mothers - and fathers - will have taught us as children that we are not good at certain things, and so find ourselves in adulthood just living out the expectations we have chosen to believe.

Don't waste your years thinking you can't do something on the say-so of others. This is the the first thing to say about profiting from criticism. Recognise that a negative comment about you or your abilities cannot damage you unless you let it.

If you have convinced yourself in this way, don't blame your mother, or whoever it happens to be that put these thoughts into your head. Blame yourself. Because you are the one who keeps telling yourself that you can't do something. You must realise that as long as you keep saying that, it is going to be true.

Here are some useful techniques for profiting from criticism.

1. Remember that criticism is the price of success. As writer Elbert Hubbard said, "Criticism is something we can avoid easily by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing." So if you do something, you're going to be subject to criticism. Presidents get criticised. Madonna gets criticised. Even Mother Theresa was criticised. The more success you have, the more criticism you will engender. Some of it will be helpful. Most of it will be useless. But don't be afraid of it. It won't kill you. It will only make you stronger.
2. Dump your failure-support group. This group includes jealous friends, professional enemies, and habitual critics. These people get their kicks from kicking you when you are up. They want you to be down where they are. Don't go there. Just ignore them.
3. If you can't ignore your critics, frame your responses strategically. Sometimes, you won't be able to ignore your critics - if, for example the criticism is coming from your boss or your family. That's when you need to stay calm and respond strategically. See if you can agree in part to the comments made, and point out areas with which you don't agree. Experts call this technique clouding. It involves a token agreement with a critic. It is used when criticism is neither constructive nor accurate. You cloud by agreeing in part, probability, or principle.
4. Take helpful criticism seriously. Helpful criticism is sometimes harsh but it's always well intended. It's not hard to identify it. The hard thing is to accept that it is helpful and use it to improve yourself. Constructive criticism is not negative, so be enthusiastic about it. Remember, you are very fortunate if you receive it. Encourage others to offer constructive criticism.
5. Thank your critics. I make it a habit to send a personal thank you to anyone whose criticism has helped me do better work.
6. Solicit criticism - from people you respect - while there is plenty of time to make changes. One of the most successful publishers I know does this regularly. When considering the launch of a new product, he sends a memo to a small group of more experienced publishers explaining his concept and asking them to poke holes in it. By getting their criticism early, he doesn't feel its sting. After all, it's not his baby that is being criticised. It's just an idea. And ideas, as we all know, are not worth anything until they are put into action. Another benefit - and this is a big one - is that it saves him time and frustration. By getting input on an idea before he's done a lot of work on it, it is much easier for him to make changes.

Only love can help you change

People will always tell us what to do, and that is not always a bad thing. But although people need other people, they need their dreams, too. We mustn't forget that love must be the driving force behind our dreams, and that without its strong foundations, we would all fall. It is the incentive we need to change to bring our dreams to life.

Effectively to change our lives for the better we need to examine our ideals. Take judging yourself and others out of your life and watch what happens! Forgiveness is not only a gift we give to others. Forgiveness is a gift we give to ourselves. Don't let past mistakes be a pebble underfoot to stop you getting to the place you want to go.

To get through the hardest journey we need take only one step at a time, but we must keep on stepping. Limitations live only in our minds. But if we use our imaginations and dreams, our possibilities become limitless. Your success and happiness lies in you. Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties. Joy does not simply happen to us. We have to choose joy and keep choosing it every day. When you don't have joy, you don't have the strength or energy to accomplish your purpose.

However, remember that happiness is a butterfly, which, when pursued too vigorously, is always just beyond your grasp, but which sometimes, if you sit down quietly, may alight upon you - as it did to me this morning as I drank my coffee and gave thanks for being so blessed. Be happy in the moment, that's enough. Each moment is all we need, not more. Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realise they were the big things.

Eventually, we all come to realise that if the only prayer we said in our whole life was a simple thank you, it would suffice. Gratitude consists of being more aware of what you have, than what you don't.

Consider this: When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one that has opened for us. A person is limited according to his or her physical attachment to things. It doesn't matter what you have or what you don't have - it matters only how easily you can let go of the unnecessary weights that hold you down in life.

Unfortunately, life is already filled with those who want to bring you down. If you insist on always looking back, I hope it's worth missing what could be right in front of you. Life is too short to wake up in the mornings with regrets. So love the ones who treat you right, forget the ones who don’t. Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher, because the only way in life should be up.

Never doubt that challenges are what makes life interesting; overcoming them is what makes life meaningful. Don't ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.

The first step before anyone else in the world believes it, is that you have to believe it. One day at a time - this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful it will be worth remembering.

Divinity, the universe - call it what you will - is in us. People see the divine every day, they just don't recognise it. But keep in mind that everything happens for a reason.

If you get a chance take it, if it changes your life, then let it. No one said it would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it. Love yourself unconditionally, just as you love those closest to you despite their faults. Because love believe in you.

Even at the most darkest point in your life, never let go of hope. One day you will see that it all has finally come together. What you have always wished for has finally come to be. You will look back and laugh at what has passed and you will ask yourself - "How did I get through all of that?"

Simply yours in love,