Thursday, 31 July 2014

Forging Tantric Connections-1


Attract your twin flame sex week

The perfect methodology for a modern relationship is similar to the one for a modern age: For health, wealth, peace, and happiness in today's world, we need two things - a sound body and mind, and full integration between the two. Tantra gives us the tools we need to access the innate wisdom of our body and the power of our mind and to put the two together to discover the enormous wealth and joy inside of us.

Anyone can practice tantra. You don't have to renounce your beliefs, religion, culture, or your ice cream (especially the last). Just apply tantra's time-tested techniques to yourself and find freedom from all conflicts, doubts, and fear, because tantra reminds us that our body and mind are a beautiful gift - which we can share with that special person, the twin flame which burns in our lives.

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Within a twin flame relationship there are many important parts we need to piece together to create the whole picture of a nurturing, loving environment where souls can blossom. I constantly state that amongst these the practice of sex and sexual harmony is an integral part of a relationship. It isn't everything, it's part of the whole. The physicality is just one method bodies use to communicate with each other.

Sexual harmony is rare between strangers. It takes time to nurture. It is much more important to become friends first, to learn how to work through your challenges with your twin flame as part of a team, and to communicate effectively and honestly with one another. These steps are paramount not only for the emotional well-being, health and longevity of a relationship, but also important if twin flame couples are going to add an extra dimension to their lovemaking, too.

Great sex might not always require intimacy. I would argue it does, because even quickie sex (which can be great fun) is a prelude to sex proper. We won't know, however, how (literally) mind-blowing sex really can be until we sleep with a loving partner versed in all our hotspots. What is certain is that a deeper level of lovemaking does require intimacy. Sex gets under your skin when we are able to harness our sexual energies, boost them with a twinned partner and bring its magnetic influence into all aspects of our lives. On the surface, great sex as just the act itself can boost a relationship, but it does not make a relationship. A great relationship is what ultimately makes the sex.

That isn't to be belittle the importance of sex in our lives. A romp in the sheets comes with multiple health benefits, and of course having sex sends your happiness levels ricocheting up the Richter scale - no surprises there. But it also poses some major risks too; people have been registered as experiencing problems after sex - kidney infections, migraines, heart problems, even amnesia. The positives outweigh the risks of sexual intercourse, however, when done properly.

Even thinking you're having sex (even if you're not) has been studied to have a positive effect. What if I told you that even just believing you're getting some on a more regular basis than your friends and neighbours could raise your levels, too? It's the truth according to survey data from over 15,000 people collated by the University of Colorado Boulder, who saw higher happiness levels in those who figured they were having sex more than their peers.

But the misconception that a love relationship must be based on sex is one that often blights the practice of tantra as well. When we think of tantra in the West, the first thing that usually comes to mind is sex, the performance of it, and how it can endow the user with stamina and long-lasting sexual prowess. However, tantra at its core had nothing to with sex initially, and even when sex was used, it was as a route to enlightenment - not debasement. Sex in this context, therefore, has to be practised between trusting partners, in an environment that is ripe for intimacy.

Tantric sex and twin flames.

Between practising tantric partners, sex needs to be based on respect and appreciation - even adoration - because it's only when the sexual dimension of your being is met with respect, you come face to face with the amazing nativeness of human sexuality. It is fundamental and basic as fire is to warmth, and just as fuel-worthy. For when we gain an open and adoring access to our bodies, this enables us to free our body from what some term as one-sided enslavement, as purely a sexual or even pornographic object, and place it into a loving and holistic context. Put on this path, sex can lead us to our higher selves.

We make love not only with our bodies, but with our hearts and minds and souls harmonised in the same breath, bolstered by the sexual energies we can awaken with practice. It is also an aid for lovers to get to know one another intimately; it can promote exclusivity between consenting adults. Men might want to learn tantra to woo women, or become better in bed with multiple partners, but tantra is more than sexual positions. It teaches a man not only patience, and virtue, and a real understanding of the importance of intimacy in lovemaking, but that when we have sex, we don't primarily have sex with a partner to make ourselves happy. In giving do we receive, in receiving do we understand, and it is through tantra that a man may understand the multi-faceted sides of women.

Women do lust after all, and women are the biggest mystery for men when it comes to desire. Even though many women tend to orientate their sexuality to a man's requirements, when they do this they lose contact with their own body and their inner compass - the things that truly lead to female ecstasy. What tantra allows a man to do is forgo any fight about sexuality and tenderness, because both belong together and determine each other mutually.

Likewise, a woman needs to understand how a man's desire works, because women's lust is different than a male's, and therefore tantra can be a good introduction for both on how the other works sexually. We are not capable of teaching our partner about our sexuality, unless we have explored and become familiar with it ourselves, too, so tantra is also a good introduction into our own sex. But at its core, tantra is not just about pleasing each other and ourselves, it's about gaining a deeper understanding through that pleasure to cement a bond with the connection it provides.

More than just better sex

The poet Rumi said, I am not this hair, I am not this skin, I am the soul that lives within. In the same vein, sex shouldn't give us value in the context of daily life as people, it's a natural part of existence - like eating is for energy. One statistic shows that 40% of our daily energy we receive from food, air, water and sunlight goes into the production of sexual energy, which is then used in the production of sperm for males or the cultivation of eggs for the female. Ideally this is how we should view sex, as energy, and as there are right ways to eat, wrong ways to eat, and different tastes for different people, so, too, the same can be said of sex.

Sadly however, we tend to dominate sex, use its power over people, discriminate against sexual preferences, and abuse its beauty in ways that help murder not only the spirit of others, but our own, as well. To put it very simply, in classical terms male nudity has always been closely linked to strength, invulnerability and heroism, the female nude to passivity, beauty and eroticism. There is nothing wrong with that, but when sex is gender dominated, it focuses too much on physicality, and in reality sexuality is much more fluid.

Rather, sexual understanding should be "dominated" by trust and love, and our bodies used as vessels to raise our healing energies. It's believed that genes act as switches that can switch on the action of other genes. In itself the switch does very little but the difference between it being switched on and off can be huge, and sex can be a medium for that. Some go further and believe tantra lovemaking is about wiring your twin flame into your DNA to trigger your spiritual ascension together. That's why you'll often heard it said that sex with your twin flame is "out of this world" because it literally is.

Click here for 5 secret tantric tips for twin flames.

Many would think that the orgasms they already have are pretty good, so why waste time with these practices? Well we need to have the ability to conceptualise something greater. Conventional truth is the truth of consensus reality, common-sense notions of what does and does not exist. Ultimate truth is reality as viewed by an awakened, or enlightened mind.

Although what we seek is often seeking us, most of us are not talented receivers when it comes to love. Whether or not we are able to give love has surprisingly little to do with its polar opposite of being able to open to the love coming towards us. Tantra is also about taking a risk with your heart and begin in the bedroom.

Forging tantric connections with your twin flame means abandoning your need to control the outcome, and allowing yourself moments of naked vulnerability to experience how unpredictable and healing human touch can be. Receiving physical love from your partner is a true investment, which not only changes the cycle of giving and receiving in your relationship but allows pleasure to move through us and transform us.

We begin to understand that time spent with a loved one is not a waste of time, even for those of us with the busiest of work schedules and family obligations. Yes, proper study of tantric lovemaking does take some time and practice to achieve its more greater experiences, but once you have you wouldn't want it any other way. As you progress you also gain a basis to realise what is truly possible. Who wouldn't want to make time for that?

In fact nearly all emotional and mental issues or disorders that exist are at least partly connected with our sexuality and its repression. All sexual problems such as impotence, premature ejaculation, lack of libido, frigidity, self esteem and self worth problems and problems with self expression are related to the emotional issues associated with our sexuality. There are so many temporary fixes for such problems like drugs, herbs or tonics but none of these are cures, but the only possible cure for sexual problems, as well as other emotional issues, is a clearing of the emotional and energetic blockages that are the primary cause. To do this we must begin to cultivate our sexual energy, stop its loss and circulate it throughout the body.

If we do begin to clear the blockages, cultivate our sexual energy and in effect raise our vibration some outstanding possibilities may be realised. In fact tantric sex forms a basis for true inner alchemy that can awaken your multidimensional awareness, your memory of past lives, between lives and even incarnations in other dimensions and on other planets. To incarnate higher dimensional forces which contain your true self and spirit which can free you from all the trappings of the earthly ego and from all illusions it is absolutely necessary to cultivate sexual energy and begin to raise it into the central nervous system.

Sexual energy is healing power: Long ago tantric masters discovered that to be successful externally or internally we must first awaken our latent power, for only those who are strong and blessed with great stamina reach the final goal. Build-up of sexual energy and repressed emotional blockage is considered bad for you and obstructs you from getting the full benefit of tantra, but it's not necessary for this build-up to cause symptomatic negative side effects.

Through tantric connections it's possible for the pent up energy to be circulated throughout the entire body leading to a strengthening of the entire energy body, and a rejuvenation of your physical being. For this to occur however the sexual energy must be able to move into the body. In most people this is not possible because emotional issues cause a contraction of the energy in and around the genitals which in turn causes muscle tension in these areas.

Due to this blockage of energy the built-up sexual energy has nowhere to go. It will quickly fill the genital region and then begin to put pressure on the energetic blockages caused by any emotional issues. This pressure will cause the above mentioned symptoms. Some tantric masters have stated that the priestal child abuse which rocked the Catholic Church to its very foundations may have stemmed from built-up sexual energy with nowhere to go. in many circumstances it may have been prevented if they knew how to raise their sexual energy into the body and circulate it instead of leaving it in the genitals, avoiding many of the sexual assaults on vulnerable children.

Celibacy is as powerful as sex itself, and can be purifying, but we have to be in harmony psychologically, physically and emotionally to be able to tap into the energies conserved by being celibate to harness them for healing and purification. Celibacy is commonly understood to only mean abstinence from sexual activity, or analogous to some virginal state as in the Christian debate about whether "the ideal mode" of life is a celibate one. But being sexually celibate with another doesn't mean we must deny the connection with our self. Putting aside the debate of whether it's even possible to live a celibate life in its most strictest sense, for our purposes a celibate life doesn't mean a sexless one.

When we get sexual desires, one way to relieve them is to masturbate, which is necessary to control the flow of sexual energy. Otherwise what goes on below will effect the brain. Sex can become attached to feelings of guilt, or become viewed as something dirty and eventually end up sabotaging your sex life when you choose the right time for one.

Too much of anything is not a good thing. Sexual exploration is about being comfortable in your own skin and owing your body, but self-gratification does require education and training, too, because it can be overdone. Tantric masturbation (known in some circles as White tantra) should be looked on as an aid to a greater purpose, not simply to feed into sexual arousal, but to release its energy. Masturbating whenever we feel sexually aroused runs the risk of linking that feeling just to pleasure.

Being celibate, therefore, is said to be good for our health for short lengths of time. As a form of detox, some believe it keeps you from losing your vital essence, and supposedly gives your kidneys a break, too. Others simply see it as a rite of purification. When you have "bad" sex, you put your sexual health at risk in untrustworthy environments and relationships, effectively blocking your healing sexual energies. Nearly half a million people in the United Kingdom are diagnosed with a sexually transmitted infection (STI) every year. However, the number of actual cases is likely to be far higher as STIs can often be passed on unwittingly.

Thus, along with the very real physical risks, the emotional hurt, guilt and other resulting negative feelings all contribute to damaging your well-being, which in turn damages your body psychologically, emotionally and physically, unbalancing the harmonies given voice within you.

Some suggest that if we go celibate until we find the right person - and wait for a period to be sure they ARE the right person - then this not only keeps us safe from infectious disease, but it purifies us from our past. Women: if a guy loves you he will wait. Men: if a woman loves you she will respect you more for waiting. And in essence when we do this, we come to each other "pure", so that we can channel "good" sexual energy when we do finally unify to heal us (and not harm the other with any infection).

It may sound like an oversimplification to describe sex as "good" or "bad", but you can recognise great sex as a natural healthy high; it makes you feel good, so "good" sex is healthy because it channels its energy rather than draining it. Tantra can also help with this theory that we must first detox our bodies from the "bad" sex (or the consequences of it we carry in our spiritual and physical bodies), because the need for tantra is not just about pleasuring another, or receiving pleasure from another - it's also about taking rein of the sexual energies within yourself.

The need for tantra

You will hear some tantric practitioners extend this to say that the only reason males need to ejaculate, and females have menstruation periods, is that their energy bodies are full of blockages. This does not make sense to me, as the science shows us the menstrual cycle is automatic and natural. However, what does make sense is that psychosomatic symptoms CAN affect our natural cycles, and emotional sex is a part of that.

If we were not so cut off from higher consciousness and our own intuition, controlling our own cycles could actually come naturally, and again, some tantric adherents go further to state that a female could even have enough control over her body to just begin menstruation when she planned to have a baby. The belief is that it's a waste to expel an egg once a month that is overflowing with beneficial energy that could rejuvenate the entire body. A female that learned to control her sexual energy and in effect prevent the loss of her energy could live into very old age and never experience menopause. Likewise it's said that it's a massive waste for a male to ejaculate his vital creative fluid too often.

This is why some physical tantric practices train men to orgasm without ejaculation, or to prolong the point of ejaculation as much as possible to allow time for the sexual energies to circulate freely. Often this may even result in the unheard of: men having multiple orgasms. But although most people wouldn't complain about having too many orgasms - for some folks it's all about denying the release, and look to other ancient sexual techniques to accomplish this.

For example another way to make love is Karezza, an ancient sexual technique where the goal is to avoid release - always. The point is to feel extremely sexually stimulated without release: you have sex slowly and gently (and for a long time) while being mindful of your partner's state of arousal. Those who practice Karezza claim it leads to happier, healthier relationships over time as well as a heightened spiritual state of bliss.

It isn't for everyone, and naturally if you want children it's not going to be useful, but for some partners, especially those long-term senior twin flames who are in their third or fourth decade may wish to utilise such techniques to add another dimension to tantra techniques.

Although it's wrongly believed that tantra is all about the slow burn big finish, you'll discover that with the required tantric know-how, supplementing your practical knowledge with other ancient techniques will not contradict, but surprisingly compliment what you know. Men and women will not only discover that the possibilities for orgasm can be multiplied almost indefinitely when we prevent the loss of sexual energy, either through prolonged ejaculation, or avoiding it altogether, some have also testified that their lovemaking has caused an orgasm lasting for hours throughout the entire body.

The problem is that to achieve this, the energy blockages that are made up of emotional issues from negative past experiences must be cleared, or the increased pressure from not losing the normal amount of sexual energy will lead to the negative symptoms already mentioned. So typically, both men and women don't sufficiently cultivate their sexual energy, because to do so will confront them with emotional issues from their past. For this reason few people have actually succeeded with tantric sex, and many who have begun on the tantric path soon gave up, as they were not given enough information or the required techniques to clear all energy and emotional blockages.

I always say the "magic" of tantra is that you don't need to understand the how to feel the pow, and within a loving, trusting twin flame relationship that's very true. Our twin flame relationship is already pushing us through its natural stages to release past negativity, and we will find that tantra just seems to automatically "click" with our bodies, with a case of practice making perfect!

However, the average person is in a state of stasis where they must continue to lose the same amount of sexual energy, so they are not confronted with negative emotions. And even with twin flames, every relationship is a progression, and they may still discover blockages that were even hidden from themselves, and so we can also use tantra as a way to clear the path that leads to each other.

Once we begin to use tantra to heal ourselves and each other through lovemaking, our relationships will strengthen with bonds that very few challenges will be able to break. Moreover, exchanging sexual energy with your partner, and circulating and blending it throughout your bodies simply cannot be compared with ordinary orgasm.

With an ordinary orgasm, a small amount of sexual energy is built up and then released from the testicles in men and the ovaries in women, into the genitals. This release of energy is where the orgasmic feelings come from. For men, it's usually a rush of orgasmic sensations out the end of the penis. The small amount of sexual energy that causes these feelings will not be enough to create a full body orgasm. For full body orgasm to occur the entire meridian system must be cleared and the vibration of the energy body raised.

This is done through the cultivation and circulation of sexual energy, and it will take time and practice. As you continue to practice, the blockages around the genital region will be cleared and you will be able to build and store much more sexual energy. These far greater stores can then be released into the meridian system during sex and cause some very intense full body orgasms that can last a very long time, with no ejaculation.

For females, the normal orgasm does not result in a large scale loss of sexual energy, which is why even normal women are capable of having longer lasting orgasms than men - multiple orgasms and even body orgasms. The females orgasm is simply sexual energy being released from the ovaries, usually into the genital area. For the male however the sexual energy is very much a part of the sperm, so as they are released the sexual energy is released with them.

The feeling of orgasm is in fact the feeling of sexual energy being released into areas of the body where there are many nerve endings. Orgasmic sensations are actually sexual energy (which has a very strong vibration) stimulating the physical nerve endings. The nerve endings are so sensitive that they can actually feel the sexual energy which is a non-physical substance. With a full body orgasm the physical nerve endings of the entire body are stimulated by the highly vibrating sexual energy.

Just imagine if all this energy was kept and recirculated instead of being lost through normal ejaculation, or irregular menstruation. Your energy supply would very quickly expand and keep on expanding.

The possibilities of raising your vibration to a high enough level for spiritual incarnation will fast become realised. Its power may then begin to enter the body, all emotional issues will begin to be cleared, and you'll become free from all past conditioning. Full body orgasms are only the beginning for the ecstasies and bliss possible through real tantric sex. An orgasm so complete that all boundaries are dissolved and a merging of both partners with each other, their higher selves, spirits and the universe can occur. At these higher stages of tantric sex experience truly defies description.

But to experience is to know! The next parts to this three-parter will delve more deeply into the mysteries of tantra and its available techniques for those who desire to know the truth, to transcend the earthly ego and all illusion, incarnate higher forces and consciousness and to experience spiritual transformation first hand.

It will prove to twin flame lovers everywhere that the results of proper tantric practice, which can be done alone or with a partner, are indeed far above and beyond better sex. It unlocks the hidden energies within you.

End of Part 1 | Read more in this series: 2

Yours in (sexy) love,

Mickie Kent