Love is Communication-5

We communicate with each other in a many number of ways. We communicate the passing of time with sound, we communicate our feelings with music, we communicate with secret symbols that speak only to its parent culture - and irrespective of differing cultures, what links us all is that we communicate to live, we live to communicate.

The drive to communicate is what links us as a species; like laughter, for example, we never know what will cheer us up, but it can have a bonding effect between strangers, a shared smile, a shared joke, communicating similarities that underneath all our perceived differences, we can still connect at a fundamental level. It's one of the things that connects us, like making mistakes, even if you think you haven't, everyone will make a mistake eventually. It's part of life.

When I was little and my parents were driving and I was safely in the back seat of the car, I would pretend there was a being running alongside the car following us, who had to follow certain rules such as travelling only by jumping from street light to street light or walking on fences. I mentioned this childish fantasy to a friend years later, and I was so surprised to find out that she had done a similar thing, and that many other people did this, too - where we sense there is something that we can't see without knowing its purpose.

We can only guess what the underlying shared psychology behind something is, but what is clear is the importance communication has to help understand it. Keeping lines of communication open makes for healthier individuals, too. Research has unveiled that gay parents have healthier and less argumentative children, and have significantly better general health and greater family cohesion. Scientists suggest it may be because they communicate to address problems of discrimination and bullying. Thus, if we know better in every crisis we would choose what connects us, we would choose loving to get us through the most difficult times of our lives.

Actively communicating with life everyday is what binds us to life, and we are on the search for ever more innovative ways to do so. Some argue that in our fervour to add new ways of communicating with our environment, we have become bogged down with augmenting our senses with pieces of plastic and wireless technologies. Others are beginning question whether "small, simpler, slower, less" might not be an equally good mantra technology.

Society seems to rush us to our graves; we are always in a hurry. Never stopping. Always impatient. But this can make us blind to the right moment; whether we make the right choices for us - to harness the spirit of the times, or to stand back until the time is ripe for fruitful action - will depend on how effectively we communicate in the now. We need to value our emotions, as they are our indicator. Feelings are our guidance system. They are there to communicate what's right for you.

Our intuition is unique to us. It may materialise for you as a gut instinct, goosebumps, lucid dreaming, or even those clairvoyant-like thoughts we describe as "flashes of genius", and the more we use this communication process - like a muscle - the stronger it is. It's also connected to a healthy emotional intelligence, because this allows us to be intuitive. There may be a great part of you that you are not aware of that you need to build a bridge to reach, because the closer you are to your core source the better in control you will be to communicate effectively your desires and values in life. It will help you to be the world's expert on yourself. Think of your intuition as a connective tool, or a link-up without which you cannot communicate to yourself or your surroundings.

Communication is also power; the more effectively you can communicate the more influence you can have on your own life, and in dealing with other people - in love, business or just in passing. We can defuse dangerous situations, or create the perfect loving environment for that "special someone" effortlessly, if we know how to communicate well. Having a strong command of your native tongue is can also bring umpteen benefits to you life.

Today many have never even heard of William Tyndale, yet this 16th Century man's legacy lives on in every English-speaking country. His translation of the Latin Bible into English fuelled a Protestant ascendancy that went throughout the world. Clearer communication, allowing the Bible's "word of God" to be communicated easier to rich and poor alike effectively took widespread power and control (and thus the domination) away from structure of the Church of Rome. Into the common tongue of his own language he released Biblical ideas fired the English Reformation.

A priest and a leading scholar, Tyndale's influence is immeasurable, and his genius makes him, alongside William Shakespeare, one of the co-creators of the modern English language. His words and phrases have shaped the way we express ourselves and what we believe. Some historians label him as a courageous pioneer who wanted to see the word of God accessible to everyone, from "plough boy to monarch". But his works were feared by kings and statesmen alike who believed his pioneering principles would cause the status quo to be ripped apart.

In modern times, everyone understands the need for change in the abstract, but on the day-to-day level people are creatures of habit. Too much innovation can be traumatic, and might lead to revolt or people digging their heels in. Tyndale's translation of the Bible was akin to an outsider trying to build a new power base, with a complete lack of respect to the old way of doing things. Change was necessary, but Tyndale's translations were to make it feel like a demolition, rather than a gentle improvement on the past.

With only an army of words, Tyndale and his sympathisers worked hard to get the word of God into English homes. No one in history changed our language as he did, to release imagination, shape thought and reconsider belief, yet he spent most of his adult life in exile from the country he would come to revolutionise. His work was to strike fear into the hearts of England's most powerful men. Tyndale's himself grew up among the common folk; he was born and grew up on a working wool farm.

The world of Tyndale's childhood was dominated by religion. England was an obedient Roman Catholic country, where daily life beat to the drum roll of the calendar and rituals of the Roman Catholic Church. And the language of the Church and its Bible was Latin, which was beyond most people's comprehension - who spoke English, a language not seen as fit for the word of God. This meant that they couldn't understand the Bible for themselves, and this was useful for the ruling classes because it gave them control over the common people - in thought, in word and deed.

In Tyndale's time, religion and politics were different sides of the same coin, and the elite Latin language was the currency and King Henry VIII of England was determined to keep his grip on it. His public opposition to Tyndale's way of thinking even won him the swagger title "Defender of the Faith" by the pope of the day, but Henry was swayed to back the reformists when the Roman Church refused his arguments for a divorce from his first wife to marry Anne Boleyn.

Henry's reformation was not Protestant as the reformers he collected as advisers, it was officially for a new, better slicker kind of Catholicism. He effectively made himself the head of the Catholic Church in the country, and remained theologically conservative - keeping all sacraments except for papal supremacy. He plundered the monasteries to release their wealth to defend the nation against France and Spain - old enemies who had joined together to destroy what they now considered a heretic country, and because he wanted money and glory. Historians tells us had the monks been prepared to go with Henry's form of reformation then we would probably have monasteries in Britain in some form today, instead of relics as reminder of the great shift in history from that time.

The importance of communication, and the power of words to debate a cause, was no where more clear that during this period. A lot of the practices of Catholics are governed by Canon law - the rulings of popes through the centuries - and had little or no basis in any form of the bible itself. But unless people could read the Bible, and get past the Latin - like Henry did - they couldn't gather the evidence to challenge the concepts of the Roman Church. Henry with the help of his advisers would use intelligent argument to push forward causes that suited him, even when they seemed to contradict each other.

Henry was still committed to a bible in Latin, and in the 16th Century even to attempt to translate the Bible into English was illegal, an act of heresy and punishable by death. Tyndale risked his life to become the liberator of the Christian sacred text, writing a bible that was available to everybody, could be read aloud and understood by everybody in English. And in 1536 he was burned to death for heresy before fully completing his work.

A year before Tyndale was executed, a Bible translated into English was commissioned by Thomas Cromwell, an adviser to Henry VIII sympathetic to the reformers. In 1535 the first complete English bible was published under the king's auspices and only a few years later a ruling was passed that an English language Bible should be placed in every church. Although uncredited, Tyndale's work was in Henry's Great Bible to a large extent, and his work endured through the work of other translators, culminating in the King James Bible, which was originally published in 1611.

Alongside Shakespeare, it is considered one of our greatest works of literature. Experts now believe 84% of the New Testament in the King James Bible was written by Tyndale, and 75% of those books he translated from the Old Testament (the first five he completed) were Tyndale. It is mostly Tyndale's bible; most of the well-loved phrases we readily associate with the King James Version are those of Tyndale. The King James Bible was based on Henry's Great Bible, and the man who was attributed to translating that bible had completely ripped off Tyndale. Henry had not wanted him credited, but Tyndale's words still echo down to communicate his beliefs through the centuries, and the way he wrote can be seen as the beginning of the English we know today.

The English language was lucky in its formation. It had two geniuses. The first was a genius of the imagination, Shakespeare who contributed more words to our language than any other individual. The second was the genius of translation, Tyndale. He contributed more idioms than anyone else - words that are still on our tongue today. Idioms that he placed in the Bible deliberately, and what everyone of those sayings have in common is that they contain a monosyllable - the simplest possible way to speak. He wanted to communicate plainly to everyone, and chose the most basic language, and that's why he was so eruptively effective right across the world.

Tyndale also influenced literature; one way or another Tyndale fed into Shakespeare, and anyone you can think of down the centuries the King James Version has influenced in its way - Lord Alfred Tennyson, the Brontë sisters, while over in America, Hermann Melville down to John Steinbeck to Bob Dylan.

Tyndale's reformation of one of the most communicative tools in the English-speaking world meant that, through his economic poetical prose, we now communicate best with a simple turn of phrase and bring alive our beliefs to inspire and ignite the world. His work not only unlocked the English language, it unlocked the English people, gave them the liberty to think and to communicate rather than the duty to mindlessly believe. After beheading Anne Boleyn, Henry once more cooled towards protestant reformers, and towards the end of his reign was dismayed that he allowed this to happen.

"Even a pot boy," he is believed to have said, "will have an opinion!" And he was right. And he was fearful of it, because the language produced by Tyndale became one of the great instruments which attacked Tudor and the forthcoming dynasties. It was the particular words Tyndale chose to communicate his translation with that proved so subversive.

Here is clearly illustrated how not only the method of communication is important, but how we use it that matters, too. Tyndale chose words that suggested democratisation thrown in the face of the authorities. Examples include Tyndale using "congregation" instead of "church", "elder" fro "priest" - deliberately undermining by ignoring the Catholic hierarchy. It profoundly changed England, his works fuelled the Reformation; the clergy did not have to meditate between the people and their God. They could read the word of God for themselves in English, and where once people had been kept "in dark ignorance" Tyndale had given them "access to true light" by reading the word of God for themselves, as he had wished.

The dark caves of minds were suddenly illuminated, and Tyndale's communications changed Tudor history, English history and eventually world history for ever. By using debate and the art of discourse or rhetoric - the art or study of using language effectively and persuasively - Tyndale had motivated his audience towards his way of thinking. And when we communicate, the most effective among us draw on our intelligence, and our heart.

Belief in what we communicate matters. In philosophy, we view arguments as quite valuable, because they help us recognize flaws in our own thinking, and to arrive at further understanding by strengthening arguments that are in opposition to us. But beyond debates and arguments, clever wordplay can also suggest something deeper.

There is a grammar to everything. Being good with words can show you to be wise beyond your years, and it can help you connect with your goals. Some even suggest that playing around with words can help you with your creativity. Think about anagrams for instance: If the switching the letters of one word creates a new word that eerily connects to the original word that has to mean something. This scientific property of creativity is called "unconscious integration", and it proves that there is more inherent geometry in our language and ideas than we realise.

Case in point, you can't spell "attraction" without the word "action". Thus, to attract what you want you need the requisite action. That might mean more doing and less talking, or more talking and less procrastinating, or more thinking and less mindless action! It's about taking a positive active step towards something, using the method that most effectively communicates your desires.

Read about the wisdom of inspired action.

It is best remembered that we communicatively manifest what we want by what we say or do, and in the same vein, we can also miscommunicate what we really mean causing us problems where none existed before. We can see it today, where we now live and work in a culture of fear and not one of working together; we suffer from spiritual amnesia, and focus instead only on feeding the eyes - which has no limit on excess. Instead of idolising thinkers, doctors, charity workers, we want to idolise celebrities. We hero worship those who have no real experience of life as we live it, and yet we look to them as role models. They are lost in the fads of youth, and they don't care who they drag along with them.

Communicating a unified future

Once believed to be the exclusive domain of politicians and bohemian writers, what do celebrities of our day communicate but "Machiavellian" type characteristics? Boy bands rivalries that create bad blood between their fans bases, and fill entertainment spaces with hyped up stories of scorn. Has-been glamour models that hackle each other from their Twitter accounts over shared boyfriends. Increasingly looking like their wax-work lookalikes, we witness these gloomy public paramours barely break into a smile or wise word, as we read their daily privileged drug-induced antics.

This has even helped create the rise of the "selfie" via social networking - a mania for sharing self-taken photographs online. Rihanna, Justin Bieber, Lady Gaga and Madonna are all serial uploaders of selfies. Model Kelly Brook took so many she ended up "banning" herself. Selfie-ism is everywhere, spreading a preoccupation with vanity and narcissism.

It's only natural this shallow superficiality leaks onto our online experience and public streets. A motorist hits a cyclist and then boasts about it with a tweet and a selfie photograph. We judge each other on appearance rather than substance. Like the celebrities we follow, we try to court attention at all cost. We are trained in a mindset that would have us believe everything is judged by its appearance; what is unseen counts for nothing. So, we try to stand out, and be conspicuous, at all cost. We try to bury others with bullying, try to be funny, appear larger than the bland and timid masses as though such actions will entitle us to special grace and favour.

As you progress in life, you try to get others to do the work for you, but always take the credit. You use the wisdom, knowledge, and legwork of other people to further your own cause. You dot his because we are fostered in a societal mindset that tells us not only will such assistance save you valuable time and energy, it will give you a godlike aura of efficiency and speed. In the end your helpers will be forgotten and you will be remembered; never do yourself what others can do for you because we've seen how successful people in the public eye have been climbing in the backs of others.

This is the "natural" bonhomie and political nous that reflects off those in power and onto us, where people try to win their argument through dominant force rather than intelligent argument. Any momentary triumph you think gained through argument is really a Pyrrhic victory: The resentment and ill will you stir up is stronger and lasts longer than any momentary change of opinion. It is much more powerful to get others to agree with you through your actions, without saying a word - bomb their homes, use shock and awe tactics, show your military might and get them to fear you. Show them how "badd-ass" you are. Demonstrate, do not explicate.

And to our allies we use selective honesty and generosity; when we apply for their help we appeal to their self-interest, because we don't understand concepts of mercy or gratitude, and so cannot believe anyone else does either. We merely pose as a friend, and strive to crush completely those we see as our enemies. We are wolves in lamb's clothing and enjoy keeping people in a state of suspended terror and unpredictability, because really we see the world as dangerous with enemies everywhere – everyone has to look out for themselves.

We act the fool when necessary, and become dumber as a result; we are reluctant to commit to anyone, or any cause, or else just enjoy playing people against each other for fun. We master the art of indirection; we flatter, yield to superiors to assert power over others in the most oblique manner. We milk people like fat cows, using their sources to elevate us, and rather than search for our authentic self, we suffocate who we really are by wearing the roles society - or our own self-sabotaging mindset built up by the damaged people in our childhood - forces us to wear.

We believe we need to play to an audience, as though we need to act larger than life, swapping new identities as the mood takes us, one that commands attention and never bores the audience. We mistakenly feel we are the master of our own public image, but really we are letting others define who we are at the expense of our real self.

We conceal our real self as though it were some magician's trick, using it to wow our audience, rather than as a intuitive guide to a better life. We fear to open up to people, as though they will use our tricks against us. We value enemies higher than friends; friends will envy us, enemies will respect us. We always seem to making choices between the lesser of two evils, and think the truth is often avoided because it is ugly and unpleasant. So, we never appeal to truth and reality unless we are prepared for the anger that comes from disenchantment.

We have been told that life is so harsh and distressing that people who can manufacture romance or conjure up fantasy are like oases in the desert: Everyone flocks to them. There is great power in tapping into the fantasies of the masses; we don't believe people could be drawn to truth as to light.

We also believe that everyone must have a weakness, a gap in their battlements which we can exploit for our own benefit. That weakness is usually an insecurity, an uncontrollable emotion or need; it can also be a small secret pleasure. Either way, once found, we want to use it is a thumbscrew we can turn to our advantage. So we go in search of weakness in others, while trying to hide our own.

Any mistakes we commit through audacity we believe can be easily corrected with more audacity. We shirk responsibility, we use scapegoats when we can. We keep our words vague but full of promise; emphasise enthusiasm over clear thinking - intensity defeats rationality every time. Even those of us that should know better make ignorant, unthinking remarks about the private lives of others.

Even with decades of inhumanity to serve as warning, people have become more intolerant. Unrest exposes our divisions - our class divides, economic divides, cultural divides, our generational divides - with a distinct lack of empathy for a fellow human being that deepens them. In turn, we have become more cruel. Our cruelty and indifference has played its part in the modern-day demons that plague us today. If the movies can ever be a gauge at what preoccupies us most in a moment in time, then the most recent box office hits (such as the third instalment of the "Iron Man" franchise or "Star Trek Into Darkness") question how much of a part we play in violence that plagues our societies.

In part three to this series, I mentioned how we need to stop giving violence a voice in our media, and not respond to violent action with violence, but instead defuse the power violent acts have to undermine our society. In effect, we take away the fuel that allows violence to burn - and the first step towards that means we must make a society where violence is no longer given such a high status by the media.

America truly leads the world on this issue - but not in the way we would like. For most of the world, the loving tone that white Americans use towards their guns is unsettling. In few places are the divisions between conservative and liberal America, and America and much of the rest of the world, more sharply highlighted than at a gun convention held by the National Rifle Association. For the outsider it is a plunge into an unknown world populated almost entirely by white NRA members who continue to believe that violence is the only way for people to express their freedoms.

Opposing NRA lobbyists, American president Barack Obama has it right about people who are against gun control, we need not attack these people, but remove our support from them. We shouldn't use the crimes of others as an invitation to hate, or use as a political advantage to divide people, we need messages against hatred, and we need to lessen the symbols of hatred in society.

In our societies, once loveable children turn into cold blooded killers, and then others see fit to copy them around the world. We read how our soldiers sexual abuse civilian children in Afghanistan, or how yet another female tourist has been gang raped in India. We destroy heritage in the name of religion, we drive animals to the point of extinction. The leading animal welfare charity in the United Kingdom, the RSPCA says cruelty to animals is up by 50%, and our treatment of the world is not fairing much better.

The Arctic seas are being made rapidly more acidic by carbon-dioxide emissions, according to one report. There is no where we can move to escape from the pollution we have wrought on the planet - and in doing so, on ourselves. And from concrete landfills, to economic debt bills, governments have become more focused on an iron discipline towards finances, rather than the welfare of the public.

In the first part of this series it was shown that a society solely ruled by the principles of economics eventually comes to fracture that society. It creates individuals that see themselves as separate from the whole, rather than as a unique part of it. We have disdain for the society we live in, as we disdain (but secretly yearn) for the things we cannot have, believe ignoring them is the best revenge, while lapping up every morsel of scandal and violence sensationally highlighted by the media.

When you read the sensationalist headlines it feels like we could be a victim fo terrorism at any moment, when the fact is the chances of you becoming a victim of terrorism are low. But it doesn't read that way, because it doesn't make for "better reading". In turn, because we find reputable news providers "boring", this sensationalist, celebrity-idol attitude has given us a mindset where we acknowledge every petty problem and give it existence and credibility.

The more attention you pay to such superficial issues, the stronger you make them; and a small mistake is often made worse and more visible when you try to fix it. To abuse the old adage - you pluck out an eye while trying for a designer eyebrow. If an end result isn't making you feel good, it's sometimes best to leave things alone. If there is something you want but cannot have, don't show contempt for it, be grateful for what you do have. For instance, isn't it contrary that we ignore the ones who adore us, adore the ones who ignore us, love the ones who hurt us, and ignore the ones who love us? This happens to us today as a side-effect to this kind of mindset. When we ignore hearts and minds - including our own - they will grow to hate you. This is where self-sabotage stems from, and what obstructs us achieving our heart's desires.

We have been trained that honesty is a weakness, the less interest you reveal, the more superior you seem, and so we constantly lie to one another to get what we want, mistakenly thinking that we are getting what we really want. This type of broken communication, in the heat of victory, also allows success to go to our heads. Arrogance and overconfidence push us past the goal we had aimed for, and by going too far, make more enemies and bring more negativity into our lives. When it comes to setting goals, there is no substitute for strategy and careful planning, but when it comes to achieving them, there is no substitute for grace.

Because although the world is not always exactly how we want it to be, going with the current order to "win" will do little or nothing towards making you a better person. In order to change the world people need to change themselves. The healing starts at home so to speak.

If the world were to change and you were to do nothing to change yourself, you would still be a part of the problem. We must seek to continually change our world by making it a little bit better as time flows forward. By inspiring change in your person you can inspire those around you. Simple things such as treating others with kindness, being slow to anger and accepting others for who they are regardless of personal prejudices are great ways to start.

Understanding that all human beings are prone to being imperfect, we must see the good in our fellow human beings. By helping one another and promoting good will the whole world's situation can improve. By understanding that we all have things we wish to improve on, we can help each other live fuller lives. Humanity never would have come as far as it has if not for people working together to build civilisation to this point.

It is important to get along with each other and to be accepting. When you are with a person understand the goodness within them. Don't judge them for what they aren't, form a bond with what they are. Such loving communication requires we work together, it is the way we work together, unified. After all, it is our continued partnerships and relationships that will propel us forward for years to come to bring about the necessary change for a better world.

Read more in this series: -1 -2 -3 -4 -6

Yours in love,