Monday, 28 October 2013

Finding Your Twin Flame-2

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Twin FlameClick here to attract your own twin flame NOW!

If I were to ask whether you were ready to spend your life with your twin flame, you would probably say, who isn't? We all at one time or another in our lives imagine what life will be like when we wake up each morning to the smiling face of our true partner in life. Someone to share our deepest thoughts with, someone we can dream with about our future. Someone who makes you giggle with laughter and tingle with desire.

Finding your twin flame: -1 -3

Your twin flame is that special person who recognises your beauty (inside and out), cheers you on to success, and is fully devoted to you. And in the past, you've probably really, truly, sincerely tried to find someone that felt completely right for you. Yet somehow, for whatever reason, it hasn't worked out the way you had hoped.

But it is all part of the process that will ultimately lead you to your twin flame. Such seemingly disastrous relationships on the surface can actually be purifying and focusing as they make us realise what we don't want, and what we do - twin flame love. However, our previous bad relationships in the past - known as karmic relationships by some twin flame experts - can also be a block to us finding our twin flame, namely if we allow our previous bad relationship experiences to stop us from trusting in twin flame love.

Some have called these karmic relationships "twin flame counterfeits", but that confuses the issue, because twin flame energy is a finely tuned frequency. As the universal source that gives life is finely tuned, so, too, twin flame energies can only resonate with a twin flame. If it's a counterfeit then it isn't a twin flame, and it's an oxymoron to suggest otherwise. While confusion over a soulmate is understandable, if we are mistaking our emotions (or emotional baggage) for twin flame feelings, then it is because we have never experienced twin flame feelings to compare, or we just are not yet aware of our twin flame energies.

Think on this saying by the mystic poet Rumi: Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. So, if twin flame love hasn't happened for you yet, don't lose heart. If you aren't with your twin flame right now there are often some common (and correctable) reasons why. Maybe you're still hurting after going through a disappointing relationship. Or you find yourself repeating the same troubled patterns that haunt you from your past. Perhaps you're holding on to beliefs that you're "too old" or "too young" to find your twin flame. Maybe you feel as if you’ve already met your twin flame, yet it didn't last.

It's not uncommon for our twin flame to be in our lives at different times for different reasons, because the intensity of feelings has made him or her "run". Experts explain this as the "runner" stage in twin flame relationships, where the person we are interested in temporarily "runs away" from the potential of a relationship.

It is before this, experts believe, we usually have one or few seriously devastating relationships. These begin with strong emotions, and end painfully. The purpose of these karmic relationships, as mentioned before, is to make us yearn for "the one" so we begin to actively seek him or her.

However, when we do meet our twin flame, this "intense desire" will be like nothing we have experienced before, and for some it is natural to want to run, either because we don't know how to handle these new feelings we're experiencing, or because of being scarred by karmic relationships, which we can find so difficult to open up about.

Finding your twin flame: Why twin flames run

The runner

If you have met your twin flame, and you find yourself at this stage, it is only natural, in turn that you feel deeply shocked and hurt either by being the "runner" or the "chaser", as these will often be unexpected behaviour patterns for you. Either you will not be used to someone running from your affections, or maybe you have never had to chase anyone before!

Now is when you will really feel the need to understand what really is happening, and so you start searching or reading about these feelings. This is exactly the right thing to do, as it is meant to lead to your own enlightenment and spiritual development, and this is the moment many readers find themselves discovering my twin flame articles.

The runner stage is not solely a male or female thing, because gender is not an issue with soul love, as souls have no gender. It's also important to remember that gendered traits don't have to correspond to biological sex, or even gender. Romantic love shouldn't have us thinking we need to give up gender equality, either, or limit ourselves to stereotypes.

It's not always the women that do the chasing, nor the male that does the pursuing. Indeed, we may both do some running and some chasing throughout the relationship. We shouldn't confuse this important stage with the traditional image of matrimony which always seems to have women desperate and chasing, and men running away. Nor should we conform to the belief that a man is like a cat; chase him and he will run, but sit still and ignore him and he will come "purring" to your feet.

Neither of these Victorian scenarios relate to a twin flame relationship. The implication that women must act as a prize the man needs to win objectifies females, while the other implication that women are doing the hard work of relationship maintenance and not even getting the pay-off of the diamond ring and the wedding dress is offensive. It seems to imply that men have a lot of power to take single women and validate them socially, by choosing them in a big public display. Today, women can find validation through their own successes as people in their own right.

However, it goes without saying that even if your life is successful and full in other areas, without twin flame love you will feel an unexplained ache of emptiness inside. Human beings are social animals, and most of us are happier when we share our lives with a significant other, or others. Demonstrating care for another is an important aspect of life for us.

But don't just "make do" because you fear being single, for the "social stigma" of being alone doesn't have to mean being lonely. Being single isn't something to run away from, in fact it's the perfect opportunity for us to improve our outlook and understand ourselves, and be ready for the right relationship when it comes our way.

Whatever your reasons are to check out this page today, there's one thing for sure - you're tired of settling for anything less than a remarkable relationship that thoroughly fulfils you, and that you deserve. And the more you fill your life, the more it will help you discover just what it is you are searching for.

Now is the perfect time to find yourself - more importantly find love for yourself and that being lonely is just a state of soul and mind - to let go of the past and come out from under the shadow of those karmic relationships that no longer serve you, and prepare yourself for when the runner in your life returns.

9 unconventional ways to move on with your life.

Because make no mistake, if it is twin flame love, then you need to know that the pull of desire between you both will be too strong to deny indefinitely. And to be able to make the best of the amazing experience of twin flame love, if it is in your divinity to experience the "runner" phase, then the purpose of this is to allow you the opportunity of some inner soul work.

Allow all the mental clicks to fall into place about what you want from life, and as you discover yourself and unlock your senses to a new consciousness and awareness, visualise what it is you want. Heal your own issues, and trust in your own inner voice when it begins to speak. This is why I give so much space to self-improvement articles, because it all helps us in the process towards finding our twin flame.

Therefore, if your twin flame is a "runner", as you give him or her their space to work through their feelings, allow yourself the same space to work through your own. How you do this will be unique to your own individuality. For some, prayer is important at this time. Others will want to meditate. More will want to actively talk or work through their feelings within a like-minded support group.

Do whatever works and feels right right for you. There is no one-size-fits-all method, in actuality searching for the method right for you is also part of the process of discovering who you are! So don't let money-making gurus get rich off you because you want a quick love fix - there really is no such thing.

When you start living consciously, and give your "runner" space, when your twin flame suddenly realises he or she feels the same way, and you are no longer chasing him or her, it will give your twin flame mate a "soul shock". The more he or she runs, the longer this phase gets, but be patient. Continue to use this time well for more self-improvement activities. It is only once you are in synergy with your own internal workings and your life on your own, can you be ready for long-lasting synergism with your twin flame. It also gives you the mindset to know you can attract your twin flame.

Love your mind, body and soul.

So sign up to a gym, or volunteer for some local charity activities. See that there are people worse off out there than you. Be attentive to the beauty in the world, and fill yourself up with it. Learn something new or start a new hobby, like gardening, or go on a short trip away to be alone or go with close knit company. Or even find and make a few friends online that are in twin flame relationships and get their first hand advice and tips on how they managed to work through these stages.

Here's what I know for sure: It is entirely possible to manifest your twin flame into life, but it will take effort on your part, too. Divinity is a map, but it won't help you walk through it. Don't just say, "it wasn't meant to be" and walk away without having tried first! When you understand the process of how to attract your twin flame, some may tell you it's as simple as following a recipe in a cookbook, but what makes the soufflé is not the recipe, but the making of the soufflé itself.

Thus the most important commitment you must make in order to find or attract your twin flame is to know that, regardless of how many disappointments you might have had in the past, or how old you are, finding true love is possible - but only if you're willing to prepare yourself, on all levels, to become a magnet for twin flame love. It really does all begin with you.

By engaging in your own proven, effective process of inner transformation, you can ensure you attract the right partner and create the relationship of your dreams.

Yours in love,

Mickie Kent

Tuesday, 22 October 2013

Her Bad Boy (Chapter 9)

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Her Bad Boy
How does a girl cope when her twin flame is the definitive bad boy? (18+ Erotica)

Chapter 8 | Chapter 9: The Return of Madame Rosario

Sally stared politely at the fairground fortune teller. “W-what are you doing here?” She put a hand to her lips as though the question had escaped unintentionally. “Sorry, that sounded rude.”

“Not at all, dearie. One of our fairground lads has been admitted to the third floor. I came for moral support, and lost my way. Then found you.” She peeped through the door, and her smile faded as she saw Iain lying in the bed. “Och, my dear. I am so sorry.”

“He’s my brother.”

“Would you think me very forward if I just came in for a moment?” She waved the coffee flask in her hand again. The flask was encased in a wicker basket, and for some reason Sally couldn’t help but think she had seen one like it somewhere before. “The vending machine coffee is terrible, I have some good stuff in here. It looks like you could do with some.”

She moved out of the way to let her in. “Please come in. That’s really kind of you.”

“It’s just coffee, my dear.” Molly walked in, and looked over at Iain. “What a good looking boy your brother is. Like a little angel,” she said softly. “You know when I was young my mother used to tell me that angels walk amongst us. People with special needs harbour the souls of angels, come to Earth to guide us, she’d say.”

Sally couldn’t mask her surprise. She said in a slightly thickened voice, “He’s autistic. How did you know?”

“Is he? I had no idea. How are you holding up?”

She shrugged. “Oh, I’m OK. My brother is the brave one. He made me brave... But where are my manners? Please sit down.” She had been using the only seat in the room. She offered the armchair to Molly.

“Nae, I couldn’t possibly inconvenience you, my dear.”

“Please, I’ve been sitting all night. I’m all right standing.”

Molly sat down, with a small sigh. “You are a good lass.”

She didn’t respond, not trusting her voice to speak without breaking first. Moving over to the bedside table, she took two glass pitchers, as Molly unscrewed the top of the flask. “We don’t have to talk,” the lady said. “Sometimes I find it just feels good not to be alone.”

She nodded again, and reached for the flask with shaking hands. “Sorry I’m not being very good company.”

“Nonsense. Here, let me be mother,” Molly said, standing up. “I’ll pour.”

Sitting down on the edge of the bed, she watched Molly pour the hot milky-brown liquid into the provided cups. Molly handed her a full glass. “Here, lass. Get that down you. It’s just the right temperature. Do you good.”

She took a sip. It tasted delicious. Warmed her all the way through. “Thank you.”

“Better? Good.” Molly twisted the flask top shut tightly, took her own glass and sat back down.

They sipped in silence for what seemed like a long time. Sally got to her feet and walked to the window, peeked through the blinds. It looked out onto the neighbouring clay roof tiles of the hospital’s Georgian style buildings. There was no real view of the horizon that she could see, but it let her look back at the outside world slowly waking into life. She noticed how the cold morning had left its scratch marks on the corners of the window where it met the glass, warmed on her side by the artificial heat of the room. Somewhere in the near distance a solitary crow cawed. Both found an echo inside her own soul.

Molly said, “Looks like rain, doesn’t it? We’ve been lucky so far for winter. The days have been mild. Nights are chilly though, I find. A bit of rain would be nice, though. It’d break the cold, as they used to say.”

She turned back and smiled in response at her guest’s small talk. In what felt like the space of a second, she felt the echoes inside her die down. Feeling so drained just moments before, the drink had seemed to energise her senses. “I can’t tell you how good this is,” she said at last.

“I’m glad... You know, if you want to talk, I’m a good listener. I won’t advise if you don’t want me to. I’ll just listen.”

“I could do with some advice. I feel like such a fool.” Despite her best efforts, two large tears rolled down her cheeks.

“You may feel like one, but you aren’t one.”

Looking at Iain, Sally felt like she was in a bad dream, only it wasn’t a dream, it was real, and she didn’t know if she was ever going to come to terms with it. “You know we always like to think there’s a reason for everything. I’ve been trying to figure out what purpose there is in a nine year old boy lying here. Iain’s never harmed anyone in his life.”

“It’s horrible, I agree. When something like this happens, it’s difficult to see how good things can come out of bad.”

Her eyes were full of hurt and puzzlement. “What good could possibly come out of this?”

Molly took a second before she replied, taking a thoughtful sip of her coffee. “You know I read somewhere about a local young soldier, whose wife took her own life while he was away fighting. She jumped from the Seaton Cliffs. It changed his life forever. Gave up his spare time to patrolling the cliffs, talking people out of killing themselves. He became known as the angel of Seaton Cliffs. They say he saved more than twenty-three lives during the time he spent patrolling. Turned the loss of one life into the saving of others.”

The story seemed to spark recognition in Sally’s mind. “I think I saw a piece about that in the news. Wasn’t his name Kevin Laidlaw - or something like that?” Kevin? Now, why does that name ring a bell?

Molly nodded emphatically in agreement, her animated hands accompanying her speech. “Aye, I think you’re right- and wasn’t there that story about a homeless man who saved a woman and her child when she went into labour at a motorway truck stop near here? The lady gave birth, but the baby girl was blue and not breathing. So this long haired, hooded stranger calmly steps in, unwraps the umbilical cord from the child’s neck, ties it in a knot, and rubs her back, helping her to breathe. He disappeared without trace, not waiting for thanks. Poof! Into thin air.”

“He was called the Jesus of the Lallans,” Sally said quietly. “I saw a story about that, too. That stop is not five miles from here.”

Angels in everyday life you see. All around us. You just need to know where to look.”

Sally tenderly reached over to Iain, trying to bypass his breathing apparatus to stroke his hair. “Do you really believe that people with special needs have angels for souls?”

“We need to give ourselves reasons why people are born the way they are, or why things happen as they do... I don’t think it really matters whether it’s true or not. It’s whether it helps or not. You know, I love that angel myth my mother used to tell me, but I prefer to believe in angels in everyday life, too- don’t you?”

“I wish I knew what to believe in. I just don’t know any more.”

“I can’t blame you for thinking that when we live in a world where children suffer. But there is only one power I know of that can lessen that suffering, the only thing we really need to believe in.”

“Which is?”

“Love, my child, love.”

Molly had said it matter-of-factly, but it gave her goose pimples. “You really think love is the answer?“

“If you look deep within yourself, my girl, I think you know it, too,” she murmured. "Without love we are all skeletons missing their skin. Don’t resist letting love into your life. Open yourself to it, and your love will bring your brother back from the dark.”

“You don’t know how much I want to believe that...”

“Believe it, my dear. I always believe that if you wish hard enough, if you love long enough, anything is possible. Love is what gets us through the darkness.”

“Or puts you there in the first place.”

“Och no, my dear...” Molly paused, before resuming with, “Will you allow me to tell you something of the love I saw from my own family?”

After an almost imperceptible nod from Sally, she continued, “I came from a poor family. My father was a miner. When I was a child they had stopped using pit ponies down the mines, but my dada had kept his father’s pony when they retired it. For centuries these ponies had a miserable existence, down in the dark mines, used for our needs. But those miners that worked with these animals really loved those ponies. My dada would often go without to feed his father’s pony. She had saved my granddad’s life, you see. It was when...”

As Sally immersed herself in the story, she found that Molly’s soft voice had a calming effect on her energised senses. She relaxed her head against the window, glad just to listen, sipping her coffee. Her mind conjured up images of the poor hard worked pony refusing to leave the pit until she had found Molly’s grandfather. “It was love, my child, that would get those ponies to go down in the dark pits to help work the mines, and it was love that saw man and pony lay down their lives for each other in times of danger. Miner and pony knew that although their love had lead them into darkness, it was the only light that could shine the way out for them again.”

Sally felt a lump forming at the back of her throat. The story had touched a hidden nerve, and awoken a memory. She knew about pit ponies, too, even though they were long before her time. Her father had owned the local pits, worked them, but they had stopped using ponies after the outbreak of the Second World War. One of the few times she remembered her father’s eyes soften was when he spoke of the pit ponies of his childhood, at those parties where she had been banished to the top of the stairs.

Molly smiled knowingly at her, as though reading her thoughts. “I can see you know what I mean.”

She gave a sigh, deeper than she had intended. “My father owned the local pits around here.”

“The McMasters Mines?”

She gave a quick nod, feeling embarrassed. “You’ve heard of them, then?”

“Och, sweet child, who hasn’t? It’s in all the papers! Your father sold his pits to a huge foreign company just before he died didn’t he? Disinherited his children from the large part of his estate. And here I am with the legendary Paul McMasters’ children!”

The legendary Paul McMasters. The man who couldn’t love his children or his wife. They had been disinherited from their father a long time before the old man had died, she thought. The past haunted her even in the company of strangers, how would she ever escape it?

She managed to push herself away from her thoughts to catch the end of Molly’s sentence, “...Now that company is coming in to do- oh, what is it called? All the green groups are protesting over it, are they not?”

“The oil drilling explorations for shale gas. They call it fracking.” The energy firm her father had sold his interests to had won a government contract to drill for this relatively new way of mining. Exploring the coastal province for shale gas was done by a controversial practice known as hydraulic fracturing, or fracking - an apt word it seemed to her, as the proposals had served to fracture her local community. The explorations had prompted environmental concerns and angered the local residents fearing the extraction process was going to pollute their drinking water, cause earthquake tremors, and damage the natural habitat, while others thought it would bring life back to an area that had effectively closed down with the pits.

She had been powerless to stop the acquisition of the McMasters Mines to the international conglomerate, and when her father’s former company had eventually been given the green light to carry out exploratory drilling for shale gas, she felt like it was the old man’s final two fingers up at a community he came to shun and despise after his wife ran out on him. Others, like the kind-hearted Dr. Merryweather, their family doctor and one of the few remaining friends of the old man, had disagreed, thinking it was the best thing to happen to their little historic town.

As if reading her thoughts, Molly continued, “Love is what you make of it, my dear. Your father made his decisions, and you will make yours... Your brother is fortunate to have a loving sister as yourself.”

Molly smiled at her as she spoke, so kindly that she said quickly, “It’s my fault my brother’s lying here. He’s here because of me.” Admitting it out loud seemed to open the floodgates in her, and she covered her face with one hand, beginning to weep suddenly.

“Hey, now...” Molly stood up, placed her cup on the bedside table. She took Sally’s pitcher and placed it next to hers.

“I’m s-s-sorry-” She couldn’t control her sobbing. Crying in front of strangers. What’s wrong with me?

“There’s no need to be sorry,” she said, hugging Sally tightly. “You cry if you want to. Crying is not a sign of weakness, my child. There now, cry it all out. Get it all out of your system.”

Sally shook her head. She spoke in a torrent of words, flowing garbled, but free. “I’m responsible for him and somehow - and I don’t yet understand how - he was left home alone. I should’ve checked the babysitter, but I was so- so- I can’t explain how low I was.”

How could she admit she had felt so bad about the break-up with Stephen, she had allowed Daisy to persuade her into going out for a change? She had been grateful to leave it all up to Daisy to plan the babysitter, to leave her phone at home along with her worries.

Molly placed her hands on Sally’s shoulders and looked up into her eyes. The lady’s gaze seemed to catch Sally. “Do you remember I told you about your twin flame, child, back at the fair? Well you thought you’d just lost the love of your life. You were grieving, lass. I didn’t need to read your palm to see that.”

“That’s no excuse,” Sally said managing to get control of herself. “I should know better.”

“Och, you’re human, child. Stuck with responsibilities at far too young an age for far too long.”

“You don’t know-”

“I know love when I see it, lass, and the love you have for your brother will help him, not any misplaced guilt you might have,” she assured her. “Get out all the self-pity now, because you need to be strong for your brother. But I won’t hear you blame yourself for this.”

“If only you knew...” That I’m just as bad as my mother. She had deserted Iain, and this was the price she was paying now. “If he- he... I don’t know what I’ll do... All night- and just now, I’ve been thinking about anything else but that-” Sally gulped hard, “I’m to blame. I failed him. He trusted me, and I failed him. I’m trying to be strong, not to cry... but I feel so guilty.”

Molly gently guided her to sit down in the armchair. A linen handkerchief appeared in her hand as if by magic, and she handed it to Sally, who took it gratefully. “You can’t blame yourself for this. That you feel responsible shows you have a good heart, but your brother isn’t here because of anything you’ve done, my girl. That sort of thinking leads you down the wrong path, Sally.”

How does she know my name? She racked her brains trying to remember telling Molly her name. “Did- did I ever tell you my name?”

Molly smiled charmingly. “Why you must have done. Back at the tent. Or come to think of it, maybe I read it in the newspaper.”

She nodded, feeling silly. She wiped the handkerchief across her cheeks like a child, caught the faint scent of lavender as she dried her nose. “I can’t help the way I feel.”

“That’s because you beat yourself up too much, my girl. It seems to me people have been doing that to you all your life, and yet here you still are. Fighting. You must keep telling yourself that.”

“I guess...” She said it, but she didn’t really feel it.

Molly waved her doubt aside in her sensible way, perching herself on the edge of the bed. “Listen, let’s just say for the sake of argument you were at fault. Let’s say it was your idea to go out and leave him home. Well, where’s the person who was meant to be minding him? Aye, you had enough, you wanted some time to yourself, but you didn’t plan to leave him on his own, did you? I’m not looking to pass blame to anyone here, just saying that in an accident like this there’s no one really to blame until you know the full story. Do you even know yet for certain what happened?”

She shook her head. “I haven’t spoken with the police yet. I thought I might see them at the hospital, but Iain had been here for two hours by then.”

“See? Don’t start filling yourself up with unhelpful feelings when you don’t even know what really happened yet. As to why things happen... well, blaming yourself is the easy way out. It’s not what we’re dealt, but how we deal with what we’re given that matters. You can’t do that unless you keep your mind on the present. The gift of being present is the best thing we can give to ourselves in life. I read that somewhere. Being stuck in the past keeps you there, my child.”

“I do that a lot,” she admitted somewhat ruefully. “I know I do. My mind wanders back all the time, I can’t help it. I told you I am a fool.”

Molly’s voice was gentle, but resolute. “A little reflection is always a good thing, but beating yourself up over things you can’t change, especially things that aren’t your fault, is no good for you. And importantly, no good for the little one over there who depends on you now more than ever.”

“You’re right, I know...” But how can you possibly know about my life? If it was from simply reading my palm, then why didn’t you warn me about this? She stopped herself just in time from saying it, because something inside Sally told her that this lady knew a lot more than she let on.

Molly leant over and rubbed her hand reassuringly. “I know, you know. You’re an intelligent girl. I can tell what a clever wee thing you are, and you’ve worked it out for yourself in your head - but it’s good to hear someone say it out loud, isn’t it?”

Sally conceded, handing over the handkerchief with an apologetic look. “Can I get this cleaned for you?”

“Nae, you keep it dearie.” Molly reached over for their coffees. “Just keep saying over and over in your mind, you going out to the fairground did not cause this to happen. Keep saying it, for even though you may know it to be true, until you start to feel it, you won’t truly believe it. Until then, you’ll just be wasting precious time chasing ghosts around your head.”

Putting the handkerchief in her pocket, she gratefully accepted the coffee again. It had been a long night, and it looked like the day was going to be even longer, but she was decidedly glad of her strange guest’s company. “You must think me such a flake. Like those fictional heroines who can’t do anything but scream for help.”

“Well I say that sometimes the bravest thing we can do is ask for help.”

She knew in her heart that what Molly said made sense. An inner voice told her that what Molly had to say couldn’t be labelled as just advice. It was wisdom she had rarely found in her books. “I really did get what I asked for when I said I could do with some advice, didn’t I?”

“Advice? Not a bit of it, my dear. I just told you things you already know. It’s just that sometimes we can’t hear ourselves. You have to start believing in yourself more than you do now. There are others that believe in you, aren’t there?”

Sally finished her drink and looked down at her empty glass. There was one name that came to mind first. Stephen.

End of Chapter 9 | Read Chapter 10

Yours in love,

Mickie Kent

Thursday, 17 October 2013

Her Bad Boy (Chapter 8)

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Her Bad Boy
How does a girl cope when her twin flame is the definitive bad boy? (18+ Erotica)

Chapter 7 | Chapter 8: The Rat Pack

Daylight had slowly dawned over an horizon masked behind the hospital building’s Georgian façade, as Stephen stepped outside for some fresh air. The A&E's sliding glass doors closed behind him. A light mist hung onto the morning. Rain was to come.

He yawned, his breath turning white from the cold. His stomach gave a low growl, and he wondered whether Sally had eaten. Should he call somewhere and get some breakfast delivered for them both?

As if on cue, his mobile phone rang.

He took his phone out from the front pocket of his jeans, and looked at the number on the screen. With a look of surprise, he took the call. “It’s not like you to be calling at this time of the morning,” he said.

A gravely male voice barked into his ear. “Did you forget you had a pub crawl planned with this old barracks buddy of yours yesterday?”

With everything that had happened last night, it had slipped his mind to ring Kevin and let him know he would have to miss their pub farewell. But why would the man be calling him at this early time of the hour?

Kevin didn’t wait for a response. “Where the fuck were you last night chum?”

“And a good morning to you, too, Kev.”

He heard his mate’s laughter on the end of the line. “Up the skirts of some lass you found at the fairground, no doubt. Well get yourself untangled and get the fuck over here.”

“I can’t. Something has come up. I’ll tell you when I see you.”

“Aye, I can guess what that something is right enough. Well just put it back in your jeans and get over here pronto.”

“Not now I can’t. What’s the matter? You missing me?”

“Like I’d miss a hangover. We got to talk.”

“I’m listening.”

“Face to face.”

“Then it’ll have to wait, Kev.”

“This is serious, man.”

So he’d figured right that indeed something was up. “I thought there had to be something more than you missing my voice. You in trouble?”

“Nothing like that.”

“Kev, I am tired, and starving. Now stop messing me about and just tell me what’s so important you felt you had to call me at this hour, will you?”

“I just got a call from the boys. They want to see you back.”

Stephen didn’t skip a beat. “That part of my life is over,” he said. “Tell them I said so.”

“Be realistic, man. This is Kevin you’re talking to, remember? That part of our life is never over.”

Kevin was telling the truth. Stephen couldn’t deny the fact he had never known any other life but the military one. Civilian life was alien to him. “I’ll adjust.”

“Don’t bullshit me. Like I have, right? Ever since I came off active duty I’ve got the shakes. Plus you know for a fact that no one ever really accepted your resignation. They’re counting it as extended leave. Now the boys are coming home and they want to see you back.”

“So the boys are coming home...” Stephen let that one sink in. British troops had numbered in over 130 bases when he had first been sent to Afghanistan. By the time he left his last tour, they were down to five, preparing to be reduced even further.

The boys are coming home. They had begun their final mission as the 7th Armoured Brigade - the Desert Rats - in the last sizeable British force to be sent to the Helmand province in southern Afghanistan. If his old team was coming back soon, it meant a complete shut down in operations was near.

“All the Rats are coming back to the pack,” Kevin said, chiming his thoughts.

“Not all,” he replied quietly.

“More than would have done if it wasn’t for you, mate. You’ll always be our team leader. I for one owe my life to you. If you hadn’t refused to believe I was dead and come back for me-”

“Forget it. Besides, who else was going to smuggle in good single malt whisky?”

“I’ll have you know it was strictly for medicinal purposes. As a medical intern we were taught about ethanol. Being intoxicated helps you with trauma.”

“I guess if you’re shot under the influence it might help. But not if you need to shoot straight.”

Kevin let out a deep laugh. “How about that time a village police officer came to the base and we put some in his tea? He could hardly walk, but boy could he sing.”

Stephen smiled, despite himself. “You did that you mean. It was all I could fucking do to avoid an international crisis the next day.”

“You always had our back. Why do you think the boys want you back leading us? We don’t run and don’t quit, remember?”

Don’t run, don’t quit, and pray for the luck of the angels.

“I know the motto, man. Is this why you invited me up to Scotland, Kevin? Did you lot plan this all along? To try and persuade me to go back?”

“I swear I had no idea.”

“You all know the reason why I quit.”

“Look, it’s over. Focus on that.”

“Now who’s bullshitting who. You know it’s never over.”

They both fell silent with their memories. Stephen blinked hard against the brightening sunlight. Progress always came at a cost. Images filled his mind. Of dancing in the village streets when the Taliban saw the British withdraw. Of the five British soldiers killed in the first four years of the Afghan intervention. Of the hundreds that died since. Of soft-beret brigades in mourning. Of friends lost. Of betrayal in the black of night.

Kevin spoke up. “I don’t know how we made it back that night from patrol. We really did have the help of the angels,” he said.

“Don’t start that again.” Out of nowhere, or so it it seemed to Stephen, his strange dream suddenly popped into his mind. How she had held his hands. The light that had hummed. He couldn’t erase the images.

It was just a dream.

“I know what I saw,” Kevin said.

Stephen turned back towards the sliding doors of the A&E. “Mate, if you start with that shit again, so help me I will sign off. All respect to your beliefs, but it’s too early in the morning to listen to you go on about angels.”

Kevin was stubborn. “I know what I saw.”

“Where were the angels for the other four hundred and forty-five that died?” He had that number etched indelibly in his mind. With every life they lost in the forces, the resulting optimism he’d met from his commanding officers had felt like a slap to the face. He didn’t want to hear talk of angels now.

“We did make a difference. You have to believe that.”

“Sure. We gave them the freedom to grow more opium and export it as heroin to our country.”

“Come on, man! What about the girls that can go to school freely now? We have given them things not possible under the Taliban.”

“Look you’re right, Kev. I don’t mean to knock your enthusiasm. Really I don’t. I fucking respect how you can still have yours intact. But what do you think is going to happen once all our forces disappear from that godforsaken landscape?”

Stephen knew that as international forces drew down and ended the war on a timetable, nothing was really going to end. If there was one thing the army had taught him was that volatile regions had a history of upsetting the best-laid plans. He knew that soldiers would always be on a call of duty, and he didn’t need to have Sally’s brains to know that.

“Look, Kev, how about we argue this over a pint later on? I have to go now. Talk later.”

“Hang on, what gives? What has got you so wound up, man? If it isn’t pussy holding you up so early in the morning, it must be serious.”

You have no idea. “I’m at the general hospital.”

“What happened? You need me to come over there? I’m coming over right now.”

“It’s not me. It’s Sally’s young brother.”

There was a moment of silence down the line. Then Kevin said, “I thought that was all over?”

“So did I.”

“Well I’m glad you’ve fucking come to your senses over that lass at least. You’d have to be really blind not to see she’s good for you.”

“Too good for me. But am I good for her?”

“Why don’t you let her worry about that?”

“That’s the second time I’ve heard that in as many days,” Stephen said.

“Who from?”

Oh, just some nice but weird fortune teller lady in my dream, that’s all. “No one you know.”

“You even sound different, man... Is Sally’s brother going to be OK?”

“She’s been with him all night. I haven’t spoken to her yet, but fingers crossed he is going to be OK.”

“You need anything?”

“Now that you mention it, do you think you could get some breakfast delivered to the A&E? For two. I could eat a horse.”

“Say no more, bro. I’ll bring it over myself. What do you want?”

“I’ve always wondered what you call a full English fry-up in Scotland?”

“We call that a snack, mate! See what I can do. Be there in ten.”

The line went dead, and Stephen put his phone back in his pocket with a small smile. He didn’t know about angels, but good friends was something he could believe in.

Right time for a piss. Then it was back to waiting for news from Sally.

The sliding glass doors swooshed open for Stephen, as he strode into the waiting room area, looking for the green sign to the toilets.

There had been a lull in the emergency room in the past hour, but now a cacophony of sounds accosted him. The emergency room had come back to life with the approaching light of day. In a far corner, the low volume of the waiting room TV permeated the hushed voices of people talking. Somewhere a wheelchair squeaked; he heard an intercom calling out codes, the chatter of cleaning staff spraying down surfaces, the clack of a keyboard as he walked past the A&E's reception cubicle.

The receptionist from the night before called him over. “Hey, love. She hasn’t come down yet. You good?”

“Yeah, thanks. Could you just keep an eye out for me a while longer?”

She nodded, understanding. She pointed to the left. “First door. Little boys room.”

“I’ll only be a moment.”

“Listen my shift is nearly over. I want to say that I hope everything goes right for the both of you. Not many men would have kept vigil like you, love.”

“Do you think you could do me one last favour?”

“Sure. What is it?”

“A friend is coming with some breakfast. Do you think you could make sure she gets it?”

“I can do better than that. I’ll get you in to give it to her yourself.”

“I don’t want you getting in trouble.”

She waved his concerns away with a hand. “Don’t you worry yourself over that. I’ll even get Tony to escort you. That way no one will ask any questions. And it’ll give you a chance to make friends. Isn’t that right, Tony?”

Tony shifted his huge frame from where he had been standing, listening. He crossed his hands and grunted.

“I’d be grateful Tony.” Stephen held out his hand in a show of good will. Tony hesitated at first, before warily taking Stephen's hand in a brief, firm handshake.

The receptionist looked pleased. “Good.”

Stephen gave her his most winning smile. “What would this place do without you?”

Her cheeks blushed pink. “Get away with you, go on.”

“Won’t be long.” Stephen followed her directions, found the door of the toilets and opened it. The strong smell of pine and lemon hit his nose as he walked in and made his way to the nearest urinal. He unzipped. Exhaled. Ignored the sound of the door opening behind him, until a female voice questioned him.

“What are you doing here?”

He recognised the voice immediately. Daisy. Shit. What perfect timing.

He relaxed and began to relieve himself in the urinal. “I could ask you the same thing.”

“I thought you’d gone.”

“As you can see I’m still here. Now if you don’t mind, I’d like to take a leak in peace.”

“We had a deal.”

“We had no deal. I just went along with you,” he said.

Daisy bit her lip. “I thought you wanted to break it off. Stop messing her about and leave her alone.”

Finished, he gave a shake and zipped himself up again. “People have been telling me I should let her make up her own mind about that.”

“You’re no good for her.”

Turning away from the urinals, Stephen walked over to the opposite side of the room to the sinks. “And you are, are you? What makes you such a fucking expert on what’s good for her?”

“I’m her friend,” she said.

“Some friend. You’ve been on me from the first day I met Sally,” he replied, turning on the taps and letting the water run through his hands. “The only reason I haven’t told her about the antics you pulled behind her back is because it would hurt her.”

“She wouldn’t believe you,” she said quickly. Too quickly. “She deserves better than you.”

He washed his hands under the running water. Splashed cold water on his face. Pushed his hands through his hair. Avoided the mirror. “She deserves better than either of us. But I can’t help that. I accept that I was a fucking idiot for going along with your idea in the first place, thinking it was an easy way out. What’s your excuse?”

“You’re no good for her, and I am going to prove it,” she whispered, coming up behind him. He felt her put one hand on the crotch of his jeans, and start to rub him, slowly. “You and me are too much alike, Stephen. You like?”

Stephen remained still. He closed his eyes. Another time, another place, in another world his cock would have been rock hard by now. She was ripe for fucking. But all he could see was the way Sally had looked at the fairground as she confronted him about finding him in bed with Daisy.

My bed, you bastard. I love Daisy, but I wasn’t in love with her.

He could hear her voice, remembered the hurt in her face as he had replied with some foolish remark.

Was in love with me? Was, and not is, meaning not any more? That’s too quick even to be corny.

He had been wrong, though. Now this, he thought, this was corny. “We have nothing in common - except Sally,” Stephen resisted the urge to slap Daisy's hand away from him. “You couldn’t get me hard before, you’re not doing it for me now,” he said.

“You bastard,” she spat.

He shrugged her off and made his way towards the door. Daisy turned to face him, her hands behind her back, leaning against the white ceramic basin of the sink. “You men are all the same,” she said, unable to completely hide the anger in her voice at his rejection.

“Don’t you think we owe it to Sally to be there for her and not get into this right now?”

“She doesn’t need you.”

“That’s not for you to decide, is it? We were both stupid trying to deceive her the way we did. You trying to get me to fuck you, and me pretending I could even entertain the idea.”

“You’re telling me it never even crossed your mind?”

Stephen paused, then said. “From the moment I saw Sally, she was it for me. You have to believe that.”

“Sure...” Sally brought her hands to her chest, grabbed her tits in an air of what she thought passed for seductiveness, and started to lick her lips. She removed her top. Unclipped her bra. Threw it at him. “You going to tell me you don’t want this? Just lock the door and come here. Who will know?”

“You’re meant to be her friend,” he said. “But you have some balls, I’ll give you that. What do you have over Sally that you think she’ll forgive you whatever you do?”

She dropped the act. “You don’t understand a fucking thing. You have no place in our lives.”

“Haven’t we hurt her enough? I’m not about to try it again. So if you’re worried I’m going to tell Sally about you, you have nothing to worry about. She’s going to find out about you sooner or later. One day you are going to go too far.”

“I just saved her brother’s life,” she said almost defiantly. “I look out for her. You’re going to piss off one day. It’ll be me that has to pick up the pieces.”

He caught the slim flicker of fear in her eyes. But no remorse. “Look, I’m not saying we can ever be friends, but we should try to get along for Sally’s sake.”

“She’ll never forgive you for getting into bed with me.”

“We got into bed, that was it.”

“Isn’t that enough?”

“We never did anything. It was all a game, Daisy. A stupid game of yours that I went along with because it suited me at the time. You need to get that through your head.”

“She’ll never trust you again.”

“We’ll just have to see about that.”

“What if I told her we did sleep together? Who do you think she’ll believe?”

“That sounds like blackmail to me. Do what you like. I’m not going to stop you.” He reached for the door handle, wanting to get out of there before he lost his temper and did something he’d regret.

“S-Stephen, wait.”

“What now?”

“What does she have that I haven’t?”

He looked her up and down. Picked up her bra from where it had fallen and threw it at her. “In a word? Class.”

Daisy looked as though she had just been hit in the face. “Why you fucking bast-”

But before she could finish her sentence, he swung the toilet door open and walked out. It slammed shut behind him, hard.

End of Chapter 8 | Read Chapter 9

Yours in love,

Mickie Kent

Wednesday, 16 October 2013

Boost Your Brain-3

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Click to go back to the main menu for Mickie Kent's Love Your Mind, Body and Soul Series

“You need your other body parts to be functioning well, like your heart and gut, for a healthy brain. And as they also help to regulate our moods, it's thought they each have a mini-brain, too.”
— Mickie Kent

Since the dawn of time, nature has been working hard, engineering everyone and everything to the highest standards on Earth, and what affects one, affects all. This is true not only of the macro, but the micro universe, too - namely the inner workings of your own body. Our physical, mental and behavioural changes are all wired together in complex, sophisticated and subtle ways.

For instance, just being outside in the fresh air, or factors such as the time of day can influence whether we think better, focus more, or are more imaginative - or even have better sex. There are clocks throughout the body and a "master clock" in the brain, keeping the body in sync with the world around it - to make people sleepy at night for example. We are profoundly influenced by the workings of our body clock (which drive our circadian rhythms), controlling our physiology and our brains. Less sleep, even by only an hour, can greatly reduce our brain power. Similarly interconnected, what's unhealthy for your body is also unhealthy for your mouth, heart, internal organs, gut and brain.

In the previous part of this mini-series on boosting the brain, we have talked about brain boosting foods. Well, the foods the experts claim are good for the brain are also good for the heart, and when the heart is healthy, it supplies the brain with a constant supply of oxygen, resulting in peak performance. On the other hand, if the oxygen supply to the brain is impaired because blood vessels are clogged, then cognitive performance can be hindered. So heart-healthy foods are good for the brain, and keep it in peak performance, and in one sense, therefore, the heart really does rule the mind!

And while in the first two parts of this series - filled with tips to boost our brain's performance and longevity - we have focused on the brain itself, it's also true, however, that the brain is part of a team of organs that must work together harmoniously to give you the best quality of life. Our brain may be our most precious and delicate organ, but it isn't an island unto itself. Liver function can affect memory loss, a weak heart will affect your brain, and how much blood gets to it, while a poor digestive system - as we shall see - can affect your brain, and mood, in a myriad of ways.

Is the heart like a brain?

The heart and the gut are now both believed to have mini-minds of their own, and so when we talk about listening to your heart, or going with your gut - it seems we're not just using poetic licence. People that get intuitive "good" or "bad" feelings about some things will go on gut instinct to invariably find they made the right decision for them.

Often these sorts of people have a strong connection to self, because they communicate regularly and trust their inner voice, or intuition. To achieve this, we need a healthy mind that can connect clearly to our core, and rational emotions to build up enough trust to listen when it speaks. This "voice" is unique to us, and we attach that element of uniqueness to our brain, too. We believe it either defines who we are, or is at least a conduit for the consciousness that defines us - or expression of the universe, or source, or whatever you choose to label the core of existence.

Call it what you will: an inner voice, intuition, coming from the heart, or that gut feeling - it's informing you to your truth. Pay attention to the signs during constructive rest - listen to to your gut, to your heart, to how you're interfacing with the outside world, because it's only with that sort of awareness your transformation will start to begin. Boosting our brain is a fundamental step towards this, and as studies are showing, what happens below our brains affects what happens in them.

We've already looked at how food and what we eat affects our thinking in the previous parts to this series. But how that food is digested, and the system we have for that, is equally important. In this final part, we shall look at how gut health is linked to brain health.

A healthy gut makes a healthy brain.

Scientists know that more than 70% of your immune system is located right in your gut. A poorly functioning digestive tract means you can get and stay sick - so it's not just about what you eat, but how that food is digested in your system. Your gut is one of the most critical links in the chain of the health of your entire body. If your gut isn't functioning properly, then you're not digesting and absorbing nutrients and in the long run, you're going to run into some serious health issues.

What is the gut?

A "gut feeling" or a "gut reaction" to something is a description of a sense you have about it without knowing why. This probably comes from the fact that many people experience their emotions in their stomach or gut area. Think about where you would physically feel a "gut feeling". Research has shown that the network of neurons lining our guts is so extensive that is has now been nicknamed our "second brain" or "other brain." This gut "brain" doesn't think for us, but it does play a key role in certain diseases and communicates with the brain in our skulls.

Our "second brain" is known as the enteric nervous system. It is a collection of neurons in the gastrointestinal tract. Its role is to manage every aspect of digestion in all the organs of the gastrointestinal tract, including the oesophagus, stomach, small intestine, and colon. It uses over 100 million neurons and some of the same chemicals things that can be found in your "other" brain, including neurotransmitters and neuropeptides.

Within your gastrointestinal tract, there is intestinal microflora or microbiota. This complex ecosystem contains over 400 bacterial species. Small amounts can be found in your stomach and small intestines, but the majority is found in your colon. The intestinal microflora aid in digestion, synthesize vitamins and nutrients, metabolize some medications, support the development and functioning of the gut, and enhance the immune system.

Our digestive system normally has what we would call "good" bacteria and "bad" bacteria. Maintaining the correct balance between the "good" bacteria and the "bad" bacteria is necessary for optimal health.

Improve your digestion naturally.

We know that our digestive tract needs a healthy balance between the good and bad bacteria, so what gets in the way of this? Things like medications, diet, diseases, and your environment can upset that balance. It looks like our lifestyle is both the problem and the solution. Poor food choices, emotional stress, lack of sleep, antibiotic overuse, other drugs, and environmental influences can all shift the balance in favour of the bad bacteria.

When the digestive tract is healthy, it filters out and eliminates things that can damage it, such as harmful bacteria, toxins, chemicals, and other waste products. On the flip side, it takes in the things that our body needs (nutrients from food and water) and absorbs and helps deliver them to the cells where they are needed.

The idea is not to kill off all of the bad bacteria. Our body does have a need for the bad ones and the good ones. The problem is when the balance is shifted to have more bad than good. An imbalance has been associated with diarrhoea, urinary tract infections, muscle pain, and fatigue. Nutritionists believe that probiotics protect us by the role that they play in our digestive tract, while also helping by its impact on our immune system.

Our immune system is our protection against germs. When it doesn't function properly, we can suffer from allergic reactions, autoimmune disorders, and infections. By maintaining the correct balance from birth, the hope would be to prevent such ailments. Our immune system can benefit any time that balanced is restored, so experts say it's never too late.

Probiotics benefit brain activity.

Probiotics are showing up in foods, beverages, and supplements, and have been defined as "live micro-organisms, which, when administered in adequate amounts, confer a health benefit on the host." Simply put, probiotics (from two Greek words meaning pro-life) are friendly or good bacteria. Most people think of antibiotics and antibacterial products when you mention bacteria. Both of those kill bacteria, so why would you want to consume anything that has live bacteria in it? It's all about balance.

You have to ask yourself: Is your body able to handle this on its own or do you need to start including probiotics in your diet? Thus it's not just about healthier food choices, but smarter ones. It's about listening to your body, too - it's unique, and so the food you feed it must be of the type that will not just sustain you, but bring balance as well.

New research is showing us that our health and disease resistance depends on having a healthy gut ecology. After all, the majority of our immune system lives in our gastrointestinal tract - and relies upon a flourishing population of beneficial bacteria.

A word to the unwise

Our modern world teaches us that bugs, microbes and dirt are "icky". We have been conditioned to make our surroundings ever more sterile, like the conditions inside the space station.

But life doesn't thrive in a vacuum – or in sterile surroundings.

I'm reminded of the visit I made with my partner to his parents in Scotland years ago. One rainy afternoon we stopped in at a famous whisky distillery in the Highlands. Their onsite shop's entry hall was long and narrow and its carpet was wet and dirty from the foot traffic.

To my disbelief, a tiny toddler was crawling around in the muck as his mother sat nearby in conversation with a cup of coffee.

As we passed the child, my partner mumbled to me: “That's disgusting. Can you believe that?”

After we got our drinks, my partner was determined to say something to the mother on my way out. "It's very dirty down there. Your baby could get sick."

"It's okay," the young mother said with a thick accent. “It's very good for his immune system.”

I realised in an instant that she was absolutely right – and that the generations of wisdom from her “old world” roots had been transplanted in her. I could see my partner's mother nodding wisely like a sage.

"I could've told you that had you asked me," she said. "What do you think you played in as a child? We had a saying around our house, God made dirt and dirt don't hurt."

More than foolish, we felt like aliens, but were our grandparents smart to let us play in the mud?

Doing some research on this, I discovered that in June 2010, researchers at The Sage Colleges presented findings showing certain types of bacteria commonly found in dirt that made mice "smarter".

The mice given Mycobacterium vaccae performed better in maze tests and showed fewer signs of anxiety and higher levels of serotonin in the fore-brain, the area that takes care of higher-order thinking.

The bacteria seem to promote the growth of neurons as well. This doesn't mean that we should all go out and start shovelling dirt in our mouths: You can actually ingest it by doing yard work, gardening and even by simply taking a walk through the woods.

boost you brain
Boost your brain to boost your life.

It could also be why being out in nature can enhance our mood. Reconnecting with our natural environment is thought to have many health benefits.

We know that city living can really affect our physical health, particularly through the release of stress hormones and exercising less, but it can affect our mental health and well-being, and undermine it, too.

Get grounded with Earthing.

Getting a little dirty by taking walk in the forest, or catching a lungful of sea air and getting sand between our toes is believed by many to be good for our overall well-being.

We humans are very proud of our individuality, and of our cleanliness as creatures, so it might come as a bit of a shock to discover that each one of us is, in fact, a complex community - not just of ourselves, but also of a large and active microbe population. There are ten times as many microbes in our bodies than we have cells, 100 trillion in all. Our bodies are like entire ecosystems, with territories like our scalp or our armpit as different from each other as a savannah and tropical rainforest are on the face of the Earth.

And despite what your mother told you when taking a bath, the most barren regions for microbes is behind the ear, with only 15 species. Not only is the skin teeming with bacteria, but also fungus, and the richest site of the human body for fungus is the heel, which is home to about 80 different fungi. There are bout 1.4 kilos of microbes that live in our gut alone. That's about the same weight as our brain. With the discovery that we have these menageries living on us, the natural question to ask is what are our personal ecosystems, or microbiomes as they are known, doing for us?

Well, it seems that the microbes in our gut could have a significant effect, and not just on our health. Pioneers in this extraordinary new world of the microbiome are making us change how we think about ourselves. In terms if cells, only 10% of you, is you. The other 90% are microbes that live on you, and within you. And it's these gut bacteria that may be crucial to our health.

In the last few years, it has been learnt that more and more diseases are linked to a disturbance of the gut microbes, and so diseases like obesity, type 2 diabetes, Crohn's disease, colon cancer, and even things like autism, are being linked more and more to changes in the gut bacteria. Previously, it was thought that the problem lay in defects in our own genome, or environmental conditions that caused this, but the role of the bacteria in the gut has been revealed by some intriguing discoveries made about the gut microbiome.

There seems to be three major types, irrespective of where you live. Someone in London, for example, could have the same gut type as someone in Istanbul, or someone in New York. It turns out gut bacteria might be less to do with the environment, and much more to do with what you eat. That's because your diet's not only feeding you, it's feeding your microbes, too. So different strains will dominate depending on what you feed them. And they impact your health - even influencing your food cravings for processed food and refined sugars.

Be good to your gut

Here's how:

Avoid sugar and other refined carbohydrates. These trigger unhealthy changes in your gut flora that can weaken your immune system and upset your metabolism.

Eat foods that are as “clean” as possible. Purchase foods that are organically-raised and free from antibiotics, hormones, pollutants, and other contaminants. Eat them as close to their natural state as possible.

Avoid anti-bacterial household products. These kill the good bugs along with the bad ones. So do antibiotics. Take them only when your illness truly calls for them. Follow your doctor's instructions exactly.

Eat foods that contain prebiotics and probiotics. Both can improve gut health by increasing your population of beneficial bacteria.

Prebiotics are food ingredients that stimulate the growth and/or activity of bacteria in the digestive system in beneficial ways. The top 10 prebiotic foods include: Raw chicory root, raw Jerusalem artichoke, raw dandelion greens, raw garlic, raw leek, raw onion, cooked onion, raw asparagus, raw wheat bran, cooked whole wheat flour, and raw banana.

Eat these 5 foods to beat bloating.

Probiotics are living cultures of “good” bacteria. Food sources of probiotics include fermented foods such as yoghurt, kefir, miso, sauerkraut, pickles, tempeh, kimchi and kombucha tea. Fermented foods are packed with beneficial bacteria, and you can also prepare your own home made fermented foods.

One of my favorite books on preparing your own homemade fermented foods is "Real Food Fermentation" by Alex Lewin. Now you can always have a small crock of sauerkraut, spicy kimchi, or pickled beets fermenting on your kitchen counter-top. And be sure to check out Alex's "fermented Carolina-style slaw" on page 79. Yum!

Another great source of fermented food recipes - and old-style traditional foods in general - is the website Nourished Kitchen. Jenny's recipes are terrific!

For help in choosing gut-healthy yoghurt, unfortunately, not all yoghurt is created equal. While it is true that probiotics are used when turning milk in to yoghurt, many natural occurring bacteria in milk are killed off during the pasteurisation process. Luckily, there are some yoghurt out there that are labelled with live, or active, bacteria that have not been heat-treated.

Strive for Greek yoghurt or home-made yoghurt made from raw milk. Click here for a handy guide to selecting the Greek yoghurt that's right for you. And for instructions to make your own inexpensive, delicious, healthful yoghurt, see this article.

Experts also recommend taking a probiotics supplement daily. Ask your medical practitioner for advice.

Researchers in this field are increasingly seeing links between gut type and disease. It has been theorised that in a decade, doctors will not only be taking a blood sample for analysis, but also a faecal sample and thus detect other diseases that couldn't be detected before.

Boost your brain to boost your mood

As scientists probe ever deeper into the relationship between our gut microbes and our health, even more fascinating is the news that they can affect our behaviour, too. Neuroscientists have discovered that the presence of certain microbes in the gut can actually alter mood.

Simple tricks to boost your mood.

Obviously, how we frame things can really determine the way we feel about it. But while we try to see the bright side of things as opposed to the negative, eating well and a healthy digestive system will help to boost our brain, and our mood as well. Brooding too much on negative events is the biggest predictor of depression and anxiety, and the upside to an optimistic outlook is that it will motivate you to take on just about anything - especially sticking to a healthy lifestyle.

Self-reflection can be a good thing, psychologists say, but it can be dangerous when introspection goes awry and thoughts get stuck on repeat, playing over and over in the mind to sabotage your daily life. We almost seem to "jinx" ourselves, but we can put a stop to this, however. Taking action against negativity is a brain booster in itself.

Case being, researchers have discovered that people's elevated concerns after "tempting fate" can actually be eliminated if they engage in a ritual that involves exerting force away from themselves. They found that engaging in the physical action can help eradicate a vivid mental image of the negative event, by literally pushing it away, making it less likely to happen - so it seems bad luck really can be reversed by knocking on wood.

Read about the deep roots of superstition.

And getting trapped in negativity is like being caught in a jinx - but it is one we need to break out of for the sake of our brains. As already mentioned, rumination and self-blame have long been accepted by health professionals as part of the problems that can lead to depression and anxiety - the two most common mental health problems in the UK, according to the Mental Health Foundation.

The human mind is an extremely complex machine and it's generally accepted there is no single cause for depression and anxiety by professionals in the field. But some factors have more impact than others. Traumatic life events, such as abuse or childhood bullying, cause the most stress, followed by family history, income and education. Next comes relationship status and social inclusion. Tied up in all this is our physical health, and digestive health.

Although I would never advocate a "witch doctor" approach to mental health, when it comes to the brain, it IS all connected; some believe even the mood with which you eat your food affects the benefits you get from it. Eating food you don't enjoy, or sitting down to dine in a bad mood, however nutritious it is, may not benefit you if you don't approach your diet in the right mindset. The mood at the dinner table as you eat your dinner could have an adverse affect on the digestion of that food, too. If you argue whilst eating, the food is literally believed to turn to poison in your body. So, it's not just what you eat, but how you think that could well be influential, too!

Shield yourself with the right foods.

There is also evidence to suggest that what we digest in our mother's womb, and what our mother's moods are, help to form our brains. Children whose mothers are depressed during pregnancy have a small increased risk of depression in adulthood, according to a UK study.

Although there may be little we can do about that in hindsight, it shows that what we consume is very important. Bad digestion affects us physically as well as mentally. This goes for the way you eat as well. For instance, in a recent study, two factors were strong predictors of weight gain. The first, no surprise, was how much people ate. The second? How quickly they ate. Speedy eaters in the study who typically noshed until they felt full were 3 times more likely to be overweight than people who ate at a more leisurely pace. Speed demons also consistently consume more calories overall.

Eating too quickly can affect your digestive system adversely, too, and some would say good eating is really about utilising those life lessons our elders told us - never to fight at the table, to chew our food properly, and to eat our greens. Moreover, cooking your own food or opting for home remedies when you feel a little down is also said to help your body digest properly. Simply put, we have to learn to listen to our gut is telling us, just as much as our thoughts and our heart.

Listen to your gut

It seems counter-intuitive that your gut would have anything to do with your brain, but one of the key signalling pathways is the vagus nerve, which is basically the main communicator from the intestines up to the brain. It has been shown that this is very important to how bacteria in the gut signal to the brain and modulate brain chemistry, physiology, and behaviour.

Essentially the bacteria are producing chemicals, or they're structured in such a way that it activates the vagus nerve, and that communicates with the brain and manifests itself as some sort of mood. Tests have shown that fresh microbes introduced to the guts of rodents can reduce stress, and in ten years from now the potential is that we could have a bacterial-based product for treating stress-related psychiatric disorders.

So, whether we'll be using microbes as a diagnostic tool, or taking microbes as a form of medicine, there's no doubt it's a mutually beneficial relationship. What we're getting with this microbe research is the first glimpse at the mechanism behind it all. It seems these invisible creatures have a much bigger influence on our health, than we ever thought. We have only just realised exactly how interdependent and symbiotic the relationship is between ourselves and the bacteria that we're host to.

Scientists are saying that all the research so far on this is just a prelude, and the technology is advancing so rapidly that researchers are hoping going to unlock the answers to greater, more in-depth questions. Scientists are waning, however, that it isn't as easy as eating a yoghurt to cure your depression, and that food advertisers who have leapt on this kind of thing to encircle their processed products with a "health-halo" have ruined the science behind it. But eating less meat, and more whole vegetables could add more diversity to the bacteria in your gut for protection against disease, for example.

There is also the evidence that we pick up most of our microbiome at birth from the mother's birth canal, and then in the first few years of life. Once you are five or six years of age, then your gut flora stays with you, until you have impact on your flora, like taking antibiotics, for example, or get diarrhoea, and you flush your intestines out, and then what gets repopulated might be unbalanced, and that can cause things like Crohn's disease and irritable bowel syndrome. There's also a connection with diabetes, and researchers in this field say there is a myriad of different non-infectious diseases associated with microbiota.

Lots of research shows that an unhealthy gut contributes to obesity, diabetes, rheumatoid arthritis, autism, depression, and chronic fatigue. The gut biome (intestinal bacteria), your diet, and the gut lining determine gut health. Modern lifestyle factors like the overuse of antibiotics, and diets high in processed, preserved, and histamine producing foods (i.e. most conventional yoghurt), all contribute to an unhealthy gut biome. To repair an unhealthy gut and decrease histamine intolerance you need to eat an anti-inflammation diet, minimising histamine producing bacteria and maximising histamine degrading bacteria.

For some, following such a diet can be too restrictive, and relies heavily on supplement pills and products - which can be seen as processed in themselves - or just too expensive for us to follow. According to some health psychologist, such diets are causing more harm than good. The information I provide here therefore advocates we eat sensibly, in moderation, and above all not to eat less, but more nutritiously.

Top 7 nutrients needed to live better.

We depend on natural systems for our health, wealth and abundance. These systems evolved over millennia, creating an exquisite ecological balance that ensured our perpetuity. But when these natural systems are disrupted, ill health and calamity often result. We see this in our infertile topsoil, in our polluted oceans, in the atmospheric changes that now better us - and in our own internal ecosystem.

Some believe that - with the exception of those traditional cultures which strived to live in harmony with nature - man has been an "invader" on this planet, upsetting the natural balance with practically every semi-conscious footstep. In a recent issue of the science journal Nature, writer Lauren Gravitz observed that lately, we humans "have been messing with the delicate balance between our flora and ourselves".

Top 10 ways to naturally improve digestion.

For example, eating sweets may bring us back to a time in our lives when we had no worries, but what it really does is lock us into a vicious cycle of addiction. Processed food has replaced more traditional fare, and we eat larger and larger portions of foods laden with refined carbohydrates, toxic fats, hormones, antibiotics, chemical preservatives, and pollutants. We wash our hands and our homes with antibacterial soap. We misuse antibiotic medications. As a result, our microbiota (population of microbes) and our immune systems are out of whack, bacteria are developing antibiotic resistance, and people are suffering intractable infections such as Clostridium difficile. If our immune system is compromised, it will affect what we can and can't eat, too.

The human body is all connected, so you can't take care of one part of it without benefiting some other part. For instance, it's no secret that physical exercise is important for good health, for both the body and the brain. Simply increasing your blood flow kicks up the oxygen and glucose levels in the brain.

As we've seen in the previous parts to this mini-series, the coordination it takes to perform exercises also gives the brain a workout, especially if you're trying something new. Moreover it's believed exercise can be as good as pills. Physical activity rivalled some heart drugs and outperformed stroke medicine in a study published by the British Medical Journal. Exercise also means you're battling a sedentary lifestyle or one lacking mental stimuli.

Tips of brain fitnessClick here to read 10 top tips on how to keep your brain fit in the image above.

Food is also important. As we have already seen, there are many foods that have been associated with cognitive function and brain health, including fish oil, eggs, protein and dark green vegetables. Coffee is said to boost mental performance. Green tea, herbal tea and nuts are also good "brain food". Combining foods is also advised for boosting brain power. Thus, eating right, getting the required amount of sleep and exercises, both mental and physical, are the keys to improving memory and overall brain function.

Learn to love your brain.

However, because the brain is also unique, you need to take into account your own moods, attitude and gut health when making life adjustments. This is why we should bear in mind that most articles we read on nutrition are not addressing anyone's personal situation, and you should rely on all such for informational purposes only. Some diets labelled bulletproof end up being so restrictive and expensive they are likely to kill - if not impoverish - you. Others suggest it is better to change your eating habits instead, and simply restricting your calorific intake for a day or two out of seven might benefit not only your body, but your brain. It is always advisable to consult with your own physician before acting on any recommendations contained in any health articles you read.

There is no one-size-fits all cure.

It is beneficial to know the connection between your ill emotions and your bodily symptoms of illness, because the ill thoughts that create ill emotions and ill relationships must be identified. Then you must be open to feedback from yourself - or a professional such as a doctor or psychologist who can recognise in you what you cannot see in yourself.

Boost your brain with support

Advice and observations from any professional worth their salt will not be a criticism of you. They do represent, however, professional experience of the issues at hand, and you must trust that there is something valuable for you to learn. If you are resistant and not open to feedback, you'll miss valuable lessons for altering your life.

I read many emails from my readership which goes along the lines of, "I wish my [life coach, therapist, etc.] would not lecture me! I enjoy your blog so much Mickie, because you don't lecture!" However, as I point out often in correspondences, I do lecture sometimes! It's the nature of the beast. But I do it because I care enough about you to be honest with you (as will the professionals to whom you have entrusted your care). Do not be offended by feedback when it is given to you for your learning.

Of course, your coach must be able to listen more than talk. Short simple questions keep you focused on finding the best answer, leading you to real self-discovery. Once you see they are your own answers, you can easily embrace your discoveries. Soon you will be living following your own plans because they are truly your plans.

Coaches who discuss their own successes and failures excessively can be annoying and counter-productive. You are not really that interested in your coach's life experiences and you don't want to be compared to anyone, except to yourself. Furthermore, your coach must not make moral judgements about what you share. If you feel you were bad or wrong, then despair can creep into your mind and doubts about your ability to succeed can arise. However, if your coach can use the terms "working" and "not working" for your behaviours, you will feel accountability and avoid shame.

Read how to avoid scam gurus.

I started this blog to archive advice on achieving healthy minds and bodies which will make you an open receptacle to connecting with your twin flame. Physical care, mental well-being and the health of our body, harmonised in a healthy soul is the true divination for love.

I am no expert, just an amateur researcher blogging for the betterment and self-improvement of myself, and the more I learn, the less I know, and the more sure I am that I know nothing. But I am growing, and improving, and I am sure that the process of learning is equally as important as what is being taught.

You an always tell an expert because they have a finer definition of "knowing" something than most people, and the humility that comes from becoming an expert: The more you know, the more you know what you don't know.

It's always good to look for inspiration from those with experience and knowledge, and we all have our personal gurus to go to - in any profession. But professionals can get it wrong, and our uniqueness and individuality will mean that the answers we seek will ultimately be revealed by ourselves, to ourselves.

30 pieces of wisdom from Charles Dickens.

Some say it is too late for us to repair the widespread damage we have wrought. Perhaps - but that's no reason not to try. If we all work together, there is a future waiting for us. Case in point, a 10-year, billion pound neuroscience project, which aims to revolutionise our understanding of the human brain will hopefully helps us understand what makes the human brain unique, the basic mechanisms behind cognition and behaviour, how to objectively diagnose brain diseases, and to build new technologies inspired by how the brain works.

The scientists involved say this Human Brain Project can be viewed as the neuroscience equivalent of the Human Genome Project, which involved thousands of scientists around the world working together to sequence our entire genetic code. That took more than a decade and cost hundreds of billions of dollars.

But even if we don't achieve the ultimate goal to map the entire human brain, any progress made is certain to yield major benefits for medicine, computing and for society. One such example is the discovery of the first chemical to prevent the death of brain tissue in a neurodegenerative disease, which has been hailed as an exciting and historic moment in medical research. More work is needed to develop a drug that could be taken by patients, but scientists say a resulting medicine could treat Alzheimer's, Parkinson's, Huntington's and other diseases by pinpointing the exact genes involved.

These are just a few examples of a huge catalogue of advancements our era is witnessing. New discoveries are being made all the time - implants that can tap into the power of brainwaves, developing robotics to become an increasing part of our lives, and new energies being researched in laboratories all across the globe. It's an exciting time, but it's also one that requires us to be more responsible than ever before.

We need to start thinking how we are using our natural resources, and the new technologies available to us, not only to conserve them, but to conserve our own health, as well. For instance, pollutants in the air we breathe have been classed as a leading environmental cause of cancer by the World Health Organization. It said the evidence was clear they cause lung cancer.

But the advice is that there is a lot we can do as individuals to lower our chances of developing the disease such as being more physically active and adopting a healthier diet. Research also suggests that such comprehensive lifestyle changes - reducing stress, improving diet and moderate exercise - may increase the length of telomeres, the ends of chromosomes that control cell ageing.

Read about ways to live to 100.

Balancing our lifestyle with a more harmonious outlook means we can do more to bring responsible conservation to our modern lifestyles, with the aim to detox our toxic habits. Modern, urban life is a minefield of toxic chemicals and health-sapping pollutants that can cause serious, long-term health damage if not carefully avoided or at least properly and regularly mitigated. Along with the usual warnings over wasting food and energy resources, experts say people need to think about their broadband, too, in the same way as other utilities such as water and electricity - it's a commodity that can go to waste if we're not careful. How these technologies could potentially affect our brainwaves is also an issue we need to consider, and possibly limit their usage, especially during our "downtime" before we go to sleep.

And even if this is our 11th hour, nature is waiting to help us as long as we realise that we are not apart from the natural world. We are part of it its ecosystem. We humans and our gut microbiota are intimately connected. Humans and bacteria have evolved together for mutual reward and coexistence.

But now, our inhumane modern lifestyle is tearing us apart - and making us both sick. We need to remember we are an entire planet of big hearts, great talents - but also huge problems and deep disappointments. We are beauty and beast, and we can't exist in isolation. Nature runs in harmony and all living things are an important part of the ecosystem. And as we can take on board the wisdom of previous generations, there is also the wisdom we can take from long-living nations, to help us lead a long and happy life in an ever increasingly urbanised society.

For a start, we need to eat like the Japanese and the Italians: cut down on animal fats and eat plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables while keeping an eye on portion sizes and alcohol consumption. Like the Australians, we can all take a bit more responsibility for our own health - making sure we go for regular check-ups and routine screenings for serious illnesses. And finally, cultivating the mental attitude of the Swedes by joining groups and societies, taking an interest in our neighbourhoods, maintaining social contacts, volunteering and avoiding making work the be all and end all of life. But the best advice in any language is that you realise you are a unique machine, and must take an active interest in listening to your body, and what it's saying to you. Put your heart and soul into living and improving your life.

The positive aspect of this means that we have the power to change our lives. The way we think and deal with things CAN be changed. It's a learning curve, and when it comes to our own personal improvement, we need to a build up our experience and intuitive trust with some trial and error. As we learn and grow, remember that moderation is the key.

Balance is important as we aim to harmonise the energies in our lives. We must all actively seek for our own wisdom, and we must remember that all guidance - outside of a trusted medical practitioner - is really a guidance to wisdom, and not wisdom itself. Parallels with others can often lead the way, but we need to trust in our decisions that have the right outcomes for us, and realise that these may not work for everybody else.

So ask yourself, how are you boosting your immune system? What are you doing to strengthen your natural immunity? Which foods and supplements do you rely on? Are you exercising, and getting some fresh air out in nature?

Be prepared to answer those questions with love, and you'll already be halfway there. Act on what works for you for the rest. Pretty soon you'll discover you have boosted your brain, your body and every aspect of your life with a harmonious energy that speaks with the vibrancy of love - grounded in the very source that powers life itself.

Read more in this series: -1 -2 -3

Yours in love,

Mickie Kent