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I know I can rely on your generosity in this first of firsts dear reader - and you have all become very dear to me during our time corresponding - to pray for strength for the family of a five year old girl who went missing this week amid fears she will never be found.
April Jones was abducted while playing with friends close to her home three days ago and despite a desperate plea for information from April's mother, no trace has been found of the youngster since she went missing from the mid-Wales town of Machynlleth, when she was seen getting into a van. Her parents had allowed her to play out late as a treat after she received a glowing school report that day at a parents' evening.
The news reports read like a surreal nightmare; it provokes the usual questions and recriminations, but naturally none help at a time like this. In truth, there are just some devastating times in a person's life when you fear whatever you say will come off cheap and clichéd because the event is so heartbreakingly life-defining, and I can't begin to imagine what April's mother is going through right now.
But more than ever, at this darkest hour, we need more love to help us shine a way through. I'm sure many mothers (if not every) in the United Kingdom, and those who have followed the news from abroad, will be praying for little April and her family already; and I'm certain my loving readership has taken little April into their hearts, too, without me having to ask.
Balloons released on missing April's 6th birthday.
Still I humbly request, as a personal favour, for us all to take just a minute out of our day today to bring little April into our thoughts, and keep her family in our prayers. As the days go on, we need to turn to love, and to hope - even when all seems hopeless.
And though there will be those quick to blame "the world", the world is what we make it, and what we make of it. The less love we give out to the world, the more suspicious of it we become; but love must light the way. Without love there can be no trust; and the world sours. Some researchers say it even has backing in science.
Is there such a thing as a "moral molecule"?
Oxytocin, coined "the love hormone", the "cuddle chemical" and "moral molecule" because it plays a significant role in our social attachments and interactions (i.e., bonding), is believed by some to have other abilities such as making individuals more cooperative, and inspiring trust and generosity among people. Early studies showed that the less we have of this hormone, the more we betray each other, but the more we give off of it, the more we form trusting relationships.
Adherents to this theory say that unfortunately, we live in an oxytocin-deficient world in which feelings of stress often outweigh feelings of love, warmth and generosity; and what activates the hormone? A simple hug. Detailed research is needed, researchers say, to explore oxytocin and trust and how this hormone can be used to strengthen our trust in others, and even treat mental disorders that specifically relate to deficiencies in social behaviour.
Can oxytocin help us sleep better?
However, others believe such terms as "hug hormone" is misleading, and that oxytocin has a darker side - and given the complexity of human relations it is too simple to say there is one hormone for love and morality. Proponents to this opposing theory are loud in their consternation of scientists who have been too quick to latch on to some well-meaning fable, calling it the "hype hormone". They say studies show that oxytocin does not unconditionally support trust.
It can make people remember their mothers as less caring and more distant if they themselves are anxious about social relationships, and although oxytocin makes people more cooperative in a social game if they had met their partner beforehand, if they played with an anonymous partner who they knew nothing about, oxytocin actually made them less cooperative.
Moreover, results from other studies suggest that oxytocin can make us more biased towards peers from our own ethnic or cultural group, versus those from other groups. What has been termed the "moral molecule" by some, others believe actually creates no love for outsiders, enhancing racial and cultural bias. It can boost favouritism and envy, affecting our behaviour so we become more cooperative only with people we know, while increasing our distrust in strangers. Thus, the theory goes, although oxytocin clearly plays a role in prosociality and empathy, the way it does this is more nuanced than previously thought.
Experts believe that oxytocin is a versatile actor, because just as the same Shakespeare play can differ greatly between different productions, the same is true of our genes and our environments. In cases where genes affect our behaviour, the same stretch of DNA can lead to very different deeds, depending on individual circumstances. In the way a production defines a play, environments and cultures alter the effects of certain genes.
Read about rewriting your DNA.
Therefore, some experts say, it's unwise to subscribe any specific effects to oxytocin, and that any affects may be quite broad, in that it draws our attention to social cues in our environment - but how we react to those cues will depend on the situation, what people we're dealing with and what our personality types are.
Proponents to this theory stress it doesn't necessarily invalidate earlier studies, but that the use of oxytocin is very complicated and more studies are needed to understand how it works. Plus others believe it's unsurprising that we seem to have a hormone that reinforces group identity, because as an animal species we exist in groups.
And it's in groups we can find racism and violence, but strength and support, too. Sometimes it can feel like a blessing and a curse, but the love that binds us is stronger then any destructive power we wield. Especially in times of crisis, which can multiply the power of prayer and hope for all of us that find ourselves in need of a hug. This collective power of prayer is believed by some to be a powerful force - like a "spiritual hug".
Can a simple hug help build trust?
One person can change the world when they connect or tap into to a global collective state of consciousness. For example, there are large ascension movements that try to gather 1% of the global population to unify in thought, to create a shift in consciousness and transform the planet. Defined as the coordination of knowledge and effort in a spirit of harmony between two or more people (ascension movements include thousands of people) for the attainment of a definite purpose, this is known as tapping into the master mind.
Adherents to this approach believe that no individual mind can gain great insight without first availing themselves of the master mind, and that no two minds ever come together without creating a third invisible intangible force which may be likened to a third mind - some call this as speaking to to God, or the power of finding your prayers answered.
The human mind is a form of energy, a part of it being spiritual in nature, and when the minds of two people are coordinated in a spirit of harmony, the spiritual units of energy of each mind form an affinity which is thought to constitute the psychic phase of the master mind. Some liken it to the analogy of a group of batteries that will provide more energy than a single battery for a light source.
So, praying together is more powerful that praying alone; but how do you know when the master mind - or God - is speaking back to you? The challenge, the believers say, is one of discernment, because the difficulty is knowing the difference between messages from God and data from other sources.
In the world we have people that attribute their words and actions to one or more deities. Many thoughts and feelings have been sponsored by causes not of the direct creation of any god, but of humans with ulterior motives, and thus the majority of our negative experiences and episodes in our human history result from these. But being able to discern the "voice of god" (or goddess) within is a simple matter with the application of a basic rule.
The rule is this: it will always be your highest thought, your clearest word, your grandest feeling. Anything less is from another source, believers say. When we keep this in mind, the task of differentiation becomes easy, for it should not be difficult to identify the highest, the clearest, and the grandest thoughts and feelings that rest inside us all.
Whatever religion you choose to adhere to (or not as the case may be), many of us would like to live in a better world - and there can be no better guideline for prayer or hope except that it come from the heart. Therefore, I want to end by thanking you for your prayers, and for being the people you are - because it's being who we are that makes the difference. As Confucius said, "Wherever you go, go with all your heart".
Yours in love,
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