Anchor Yourself with Love

“It is a psychological law that whatever we wish to accomplish we must impress on the subjective or subconscious mind.”
— Orison Swett Marden

The purpose of this series of articles about the powerful synergy of mind, body and soul is all about raising mood to levels that help us overcome the challenges of daily living. So when I write about the topical news stories that are affecting are lives today, it is not to bring our mood down. Looking at the current situation of our world can help us look at the way that we see our life and how we are living it at the moment.

The end of summer for us in northern hemisphere usually signals the end of family vacations, and of getting ready to hibernate in our homes during the cold weather. In periods of such transition, our moods of optimism are contrasted with darker moods that plight an (as always) uncertain future. While the death of Neil Armstrong, the first man to set foot on the Moon, reminds us of what human endeavour is capable, John Gray, for the BBC's A Point of View warns us of the darker side of human endeavour.

Gray says that we've forgotten our own history and neglect the dangers we currently face, and in the BBC article outlines a future where freedom and democracy do not always go hand in hand, and that toxic democracies based on nationalism and xenophobia could emerge in a number of countries and be in power for long periods. We're also facing a toxic climate due to our increasing usage of new technologies.

In recent decades, red skies at night have taken on a new meaning. As outside lighting has become more prominent, so our night skies have been gradually turning from black to red. Research suggests that the growing popularity of LED lights, which emit shorter wavelengths than gas-discharge lamps, is making the night sky brighter still. And it could have a significant effect on nature, by disrupting the circadian rhythms of animals, ourselves included.

And while advanced technologies are a good thing, it seems rather than push to expand on triumphs such as Armstrong, we're more focused on technologies that can imprison us in our homes. Creating a new high-resolution television format will have great implications for medical imaging, it's true, but there is also more to life than television. Life is here and now, not on a piece of fancy flat screen on the wall. Realising this, some have even tried going cold turkey on a sabbatical from the web and a "digital detox". Some say the amount of technology being used - such as in cars for example - runs a real risk of becoming a safety hazard to drivers.

This isn't about shunning technology, however. We need to focus on technologies that will expand our freedoms; make society more accepting of people of all shapes and sizes. For example, I think it is criminal that national airlines in Britain still are not properly equipped to provide its wheelchair customers the same level of service as it does to others. We need freedom because our goals and values are highly diverse and often quite different from those of the people around us, but once you think of freedom as living as you choose, you'll discover there are many obstacles that seem to stand in your way.

But if we want a future in which freedom is the natural human condition, then we must all become more aware of the current state of our world. There are some that find the practice of meditation and raising energy does increase their awareness. They become more aware of energies, forces, and interactions than they were before.

Read about the power of meditation.

Becoming more sensitive can also mean becoming, or at least feeling, more vulnerable. We interact energetically with each other in non-physical and often unconscious ways. Some of these interactions, experts warn, involve destructive energy and some involve constructive energy.

Interactions of like

“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.”
— Mark Twain

There is a basic principle that defines the kind of friends you have, the kind of associates that you have, and the environment that you reside in. That is: Like attracts like and like associates with like. If you are mentally and emotionally vulnerable because of erroneous beliefs, guilt or other complexes, some believe you may attract "like for like" negative energies, or associate with negative people who feed off your energy. This only complicates and exacerbates the problems you already have, and makes it more difficult to deal with and resolve issues.

Read more about energy vampires.

Others believe we weight ourselves down with addictions, like stone around our neck. Attachments like addictions to alcohol, drugs, or emotional issues or the possession of material things can only drag us down further. For example, someone with an addiction to alcohol may hang around a bar and attach themselves to a living being who shares their addiction. That individual then has a second mind exerting will to direct his or her behaviour and draining vital energy.

Sometimes these friends or associates can have benign intentions, and they may need healing, too. But you need to know how to protect yourself from negative energies and negative people.

One key element of protecting yourself is establishing a positive attitude. Recall that like attracts like. If you dwell on angry thoughts and feelings, it's said you actually weaken your energy fields and attract other angry energies, both in physical form and non-physical form. The conscious mind withdraws into the subconscious mind and the subconscious mind becomes the operative mind.

Click here to rewire your mindset for success!

Simply being aware of your thoughts and making choices to disengage negative thinking and replace it with positive thinking goes a long way towards self protection. If you find that difficult, pause and ask yourself why. Also ask yourself if these thoughts are really yours. Changing how we think and make choices is part of our growth process and will be an ongoing development through your entire life.

Another key element of self protection is setting permissions. We must get into a mindset that believes in our normal, everyday lives it is very difficult for others to do us harm unless we allow it. We choose the friends we make, who we should bring into our circle and who to stay away from. Individuals who deny permission to have their energy drained are not easy prey. If you have an attitude and determination that you will defend and protect yourself without compromise, people who might ordinarily hang around you to absorb some of your energy will stay away. You don't even have to say anything.

To protect yourself, experts emphasise you must develop the habit of looking at everything with a sense of penetrating awareness rather than unconscious acceptance or passive ignorance. Others call this critical thinking, or just being aware of your thoughts and actions, and actively challenging negative ones.

Moreover, it's believed that if you allow your energy levels to lower (by being negative) this in turn makes you more vulnerable to negative situations. Thus enhancing your vital energy (shifting your frequency through meditation) and overall health and strength is also another factor in your defence against negativity. As you become more consciously aware, your sensitivity to such situations will increase. When you are aware that someone is being trying to bring you down, for example, you can intervene and stop it. In this way, your improving sensitivity is your friend, not your liability. But you will be more effective if you simply act decisively rather than react emotionally.

There will come times we all struggle with our emotions, and some of us will even have tried to change our mood because we knew a better state of mind would better suit whatever it was we were doing. The more you FEEL GOOD, the more happy and easy your life will be. It sounds absurdly obvious, but if you feel good more often, you likely have an increase in overall happiness.

This is common sense; feeling good as opposed to feeling bad, significantly increases the chance for you to make better decisions - better choices. Experts say bad feelings tend to corrupt people's ability to make good decisions. Good feelings tend to increase people's ability to make good decisions.

Every decision you make from what clothes to wear, to how well you brush your teeth to the things you say to people, carry with them short term and/or long term consequences. These consequences will either make your life easier and happier or they will make your life a harder and less enjoyable. Some consequences will show up very quickly and other will show up over time.

The bottom line is, your life, as it is now, like it or not, has been greatly constructed on the back of the good decisions and bad decisions you've made to this point. Thus, the theory goes, if you can control your feelings you can make better decisions. Some suggest by using an anchor - a conditioned stimuli - you can FEEL the way you want to FEEL, when you want to FEEL it.

Anchor yourself to love

Anchoring is a method utilised in neuro-linguistic programming (NLP). It helps to think of an anchor as physical button that you can push, that will instantly change the way you feel. Imagine what you could do, if you could create several buttons that are plugged into your neurology that command you to feel the way you want to feel, when you want to feel it when the button is pushed.

You can use anchors for many different reasons, but one favourite way to use them is to improve your mood - your mental and physical state so that your are more likely to naturally and easily make better decisions. I personally use anchors in this way because I also enjoy feeling good as oppose to feeling bad. Who doesn't generally?

If you do it right, you can anchor yourself, using a sound, a smell, a visual or a physical sensation to programme yourself to feel something very useful and powerful that will change your life forever. Some experts have suggested that the best way to anchor is to use more than one modality. For example, some people like to anchor themselves using a sound and physical sensation; they pinch or press down firmly somewhere specific on their body for one second as they repeat a word or a affirming phrase to themselves in a very specific way. This way they have a feeling and a sound to help create a powerful anchor.

The trick is picking the right emotion or feeling to anchor. I often go with powerful and confident but you can pick anything you like. For me, powerful and confident really helps with a wide variety of situations especially when dealing with others on a daily basis. Researching this method of anchoring has brought up 10 easy steps so that anyone can try it for themselves.

1. Find a quite place where you will not be disturbed and you will not disturb others.


2. Decide on a feeling or emotional state that you think would really benefit you if you could turn it on and feel it in every pore of your body, on demand.


3. Decide on how you will anchor yourself. If you use example strategy above, you will require a "power word" and a location on your body that you will firmly press on for one second. TIP: It is critically important that when you anchor yourself that you use the exact physical location on your body and the exact word with the exact volume and intonation every time you anchor yourself. When it comes time to fire off the anchor, you will want to reproduce the exact physical sensation, in the exact location with the exact sound that you used when you created the anchor.


4. Get yourself into the physical and emotional state that you want to anchor. TIP: I like to use music, my imagination, pictures, body movements, I do whatever it takes to reproduce the emotion that I want to anchor. My twin flame uses this technique, too and sometimes he will jump around crazily screaming he is the ruler of the world, just to get his juices going. My point is, use your body, use your surroundings, and use anything and everything to help you re-create the state you want to anchor.


5. Once you are feeling the feeling you want to feel and you are just about to reach the climax of this state, anchor yourself using the method that you have chosen. TIP: You want to make certain that you anchor yourself just before you reach the apex of the emotion (as the emotions is still increasing in intensity in your body) you want to avoid creating an anchor as the feeling is losing intensity. Experts claim it is really important that you create the anchor as the intensity is still increasing.


6. Once you've anchored the emotion, shake it off. Return yourself to a neutral state.


7. Repeat the anchoring process 10 times or until you can fire off that anchor and your body begins to instantly respond by calling up the emotion that you anchored.


8. Fire off the anchor to test to see if it works. If you begin to feel the feeling you were going for when you fire off the anchor, you've succeeded. TIP: You may not feel the feeling with the exact same intensity, that's fine as long as the feeling is strong enough to counteract a bad mood or negative experience.


9. Use the anchor in everyday life to help improve your moods and help you make better decisions.


10. Every now and again, go and re-anchor the feeling just keep it working nice and strong.

Anchoring takes practice, the more you do it, the more you will be able to create powerful anchors that you can use for a variety of reasons. Adherents to anchoring say the possibilities are endless.

When you first star you might find your anchors where weak, they barely do the job, and you will have to go back and re-anchor the feelings often. However, after a few months of practising building anchors, you'll find it easier to do and your anchors can become very powerful. They also don't have an expiry date - many claim they still use anchors they creates years ago, and that they work just as well. Some say they don't even have to consciously anchor themselves any more.

Encourage yourself to learn the process and keep at it because once you get really good at anchoring yourself, you can make doors swing wide open for you by using just a little bit of creativity. You can also feel good more often and begin transforming your life into the masterpiece that it deserves to be. And anchoring is just one step that experts say you can use to lay the foundation for your very own dream life.

Click here for 5 ways to change your life!

By harnessing the power of anchoring and affirmations together with implementing a few other suggested steps, it may be possible to manifest with far greater velocity.

Take simple steps to achieve your dreams

Here are some more steps that experts say will help you attract and create your own dream life.

• Set goals: Some experts are proponents to the theory that one of the key steps in achieving your dream is to set goals on a consistent basis. You need to create goals both for the long term and the short term, and put them in writing. Studies have shown that when you write down a goal the chances of achieving it are a thousand times greater.

  Have a plan and a direction. Know what you want to accomplish: not just for the day, but in the big picture. With a clear schedule and mind, and a focused to-do list that has been properly seeded with preparation will allow you to be as productive as possible. Here are some goal setting strategies from the experts:

  1. Goals must be specific, measurable, attainable and realistic.
  2. Goals must have a time limit.
  3. Goals must be positive, personal, and in the present tense.
  4. Rewrite, review and visualise the achievement of your goals on a daily basis.


• Visualise: It's said that without a vision, people perish. Make a habit of visualising your dream on a daily basis.


• Be persistent: Now that you have your goals written down and you are doing your daily visualisation exercises you need to have persistence. Some people it can take years for them to achieve their dreams.


• Have faith: There is a saying which goes, "The size of your success is determined by the size of your belief". Experts always point out the importance of having an uncompromising faith in oneself is a critical component in accomplishing your goals. Whatever your mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.


• Exhibit discipline: With every disciplined effort there is a multiple reward. Discipline is a key component required to achieve your goals and dreams. When working toward your dream think of discipline as having the ability to flick the little doubting man off your shoulder who says, "Can you really do this?" You need to have the "I can do it!" attitude. Holding the vision or experience that inspired you in the forefront of your mind will help you stay disciplined. Use that as an anchor. Remember - self doubt destroys.


• Have gratitude: One of the most important qualities one can have on one's journey to obtaining a dream is an attitude of gratitude. Gratitude will raise your energy levels, and become part of your self-defence against negativity when faced with challenges. It puts us in a positive mood, it helps us be in the present, and it helps us to attract what we want into our lives too. If you're not thankful for what you've got, then you're not likely to be thankful for what you're going to get. Every morning I make a habit of spending a minimum of five minutes reflecting on the many things I am truly grateful for in my life. I say to myself:

  This is the beginning of a new day full of new opportunities and possibilities. I am thankful and grateful for this day. I know that life is planning to do me good today, and I am curious and cannot wait to see what it is. Something GREAT is going to happen today!

  When you are grateful for life's gifts, you are truly rich.

• Find a support group: It has often been heard said that a grief shared is a half a grief, and a joy shared is twice a joy. And as it is true we need to defend ourselves from negative people, it is also true that associated with like-minded people is beneficial for support. The ability to seek out and learn from others, specifically those who have already accomplished similar goals and dreams, is an invaluable resource for your success, and will sometimes help quicken your journey towards goal completion.

Experts in the area of goal setting will emphasise that being successful in life can greatly be attributed to whether you set goals for yourself. It's often said when you fail to plan, you plan to fail. Thus goal setting can go wildly wrong for a number of reasons. When this happens, it is very easy for you to lose faith in the goal achievement process, not to mention taking a knock to your confidence. When goal setting goes wrong, not only are the benefits of goal setting lost, but the whole process of future goal setting can be derailed.

Experts have over the years provided recommendations on how to avoid certain pitfalls when defining goals to pursue, underlining the five biggest goal setting mistakes, we must be sure to avoid making in our personal success journey. Below I take a closer look at the goal setting mistakes the experts say we would do well to avoid.

• Setting out of control outcome goals: "Out of control" outcome goals refers to setting objectives that focus on getting end results that are out of your control. For example, you set a personal goal of graduating at the top of your class. However, you have no control over the performance of other students in your class. As such, you are vulnerable to having someone else edge you out of the top spot even after you have put full effort into your studies.

  I don't strictly adhere to this way of thinking, however. It's true you have no control over anyone else's performance but your own, and YOU should be your only competition. In such a scenario, even if don't graduate at the top of the class, if you've done your absolute personal best you've graduated at the top of your own class. Your goals should be grounded in reality, but not limited because of other people. If there is a top spot our their you want to set your sights on you have to be able to see your name on it - you have to believe it's doable.

• Goals set unrealistically high: Experts say that when a goal is seen as unreachable within the set time lines, enthusiasm to complete the goal fades very quickly. For example, you have only just started learning karate, but you have set a goal of being able to break concrete blocks with your bare hands in the next three months.

  Obviously we have to have realistic guidelines, and restricting your goals to a very short time period generates unnecessary pressure. Experts do suggest a specific time line for motivation, but ultimately your focus should be on the goal itself, and on your own improvement.

• Goals set unrealistically low: Goals setting is a means to an end in the process of building new skills and improving your self confidence. Setting goals that are too easily achieved are a waste of time, because you do not develop your willpower or any new skills in the process of achieving such easy targets.
• Vague goals: Vague goals have no start or finish line and that's why they usually remain undone. Perhaps the most popular vague goal is "I want to be rich". There is no stated time frame, steps to be taken or identification of the key short term goals that will need to be achieved on the way to becoming rich. So it comes as no surprise, that people who do not move beyond simply saying such vague goals do not achieve them.
• Many competing top goals: Experts warn that your top goals must work together or they will pull your life apart. For example, life goals such as starting a family and getting a promotion to a senior corporate management positions should not be top goals at the same time.

  New corporate management positions usually require that long hours be spent learning your new roles. This can eat into the evening time that would be required for your young family. Such competing top goals can lead to you feeling overwhelmed and stressed out.

Raising your consciousness

Boosting your brain power is another key to increasing your awareness. Experts say this acts as another form of self-defence, i.e., critical thinking. Informed choices are better choices, and focus takes brainpower. The power of your mind is quite simply immense. When you learn to increase your IQ, you can, quite simply, break through to heightened consciousness and inner power.

IQ and intelligence increasing is one of those topics where most people think they are stuck with the mental abilities they have. In fact, society has programmed us to believe that intelligence is genetic and that it can't change, but this couldn't be further from the truth.

Experts say the truth is that the latest scientific research has shown conclusively that IQ and intellectual ability can be increased, regardless of genetics. This is through training in something termed as "working memory" which is the basis for "fluid intelligence", the technical name for your raw intellectual abilities. If you perform very specific mental training exercises, you can change the structure of your brain, leading to dramatic improvements in IQ scores, problem solving, logic abilities, grammar and creativity.

One of these ways is called the pseudo telekinesis technique (PT) technique, which is an useful training exercise to unleash your mind power and increase IQ. If you practice this technique for 5-10 minutes every day, 5 days per week, you will notice dramatic mental changes that can change your life. You start by answering a question which in turn reveals a great secret about increasing your intelligence.

The question is: What do you think is the typical human concentration span? Your choices are:

a) 10 minutes
b) 20 minutes
c) 40 minutes
d) 2 hours

The answer is that the human concentration span is none of those choices. The concentration span is actually only 7 seconds. Whereas your attention span can be 30-40 minutes, your concentration span is actually extremely limited. Try this little experiment now to prove this to yourself now:

1. Look at a distinct quality of any object in the room you are in (for example the colour, the edge, or the shape).


2. Place your concentration on that specific quality of the object.


3. Notice how your concentration on that quality wavers to another quality of the object, within seconds.

You might be able to focus your attention on a task for 40 minutes or more, but you can't focus your concentration on a particular quality for more than a few seconds. Your concentration span acts as a "doorway" by which all of your other mental abilities can come about. As your concentration improves, your ability to access the subconscious super mind also improves. And here lies a secret to increasing your intelligence.

Since your concentration span is so tiny, if you can find a technique to INCREASE your concentration span, by even a second, it will lead to a huge increase in mental ability overall.

This is where the PT technique to increase IQ comes in. The other mental improvements that this technique is believed to give are increased ability to listen more carefully, increased mathematical and logical ability, ability to sustain more complex arguments, increased ability to extract relevant information from sources and increased ease in memorising things.

As mentioned, if you practice this technique for 5-10 minutes every day, 5 days per week, you will notice dramatic mental changes that can change your life. Here it is, explained step by step:

1. Get a coin and place it in front of you, preferably sitting flat on a table. You can also do this exercise for any other object you want, but a small metal object is best, simply because it's easier to focus on. Make sure you are in a comfortable sitting location and in a place in which you won't be disturbed, for at least 15 minutes.


2. Next, look at the coin from a distance of about 30 to 40 cm away and concentrate your full attention on the shape of the coin. Now turn your attention to the closest edge of the coin. You won't need to touch the coin for the whole exercise.


3. Place your attention on the side-edge of the coin and try and force all your mental attention and thoughts to be concentrated on that edge. This means you simply want to force all of your concentration and mental energy on the edge of the coin. The easiest way to do this is to look directly and only on the edge of the coin.


4. You should imagine that the mental attention, concentration and your thoughts which you're letting out is acting as a force to make the coin move. Mentally push with your concentration towards the edge of the coin as hard as possible and imagine this mental push and force of concentration is like a force which can make the coin move.


5. Make sure you are looking at the edge of the coin throughout the whole exercise. Make sure you are not wandering with your thoughts or getting different thoughts in your mind. Try and keep your mind totally focused on the edge.


6. If you're doing the technique correctly, you'll become unaware of your surroundings. If you become distracted (which you may at first), turn your attention back to the coin and firmly try to keep it there.

The common themes of regret

If we are not diligent, for many of us, the common themes of regret will surface again and again in our lives. But rather that wish you had the courage to live a life true to yourself, and not the life others expected of you, it is time to turn that wish into a reality.

It is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, this is the most common regret of all.

Most people have had not honoured even a half of their dreams and will to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way - even of this means getting off the treadmill of a work existence. Without love for what you do, you simply become a drone. By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. By creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle. Or you can go after your passions, create value with what you enjoy to do, and generate income that way.

Expressing yourself creatively is also part and parcel of expressing your feelings, and another regret is the regret of not finding the courage to express our feelings. Many people suppress their feelings in order to keep peace with others. Many develop illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carry as a result, or they settle for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win because it involves constructive energy, and the dropping of attachments that are like stones around your neck. Relationships are an integral part of regret, and sometimes not because of the ones we allowed to dominate us, but because of the ones we let go.

Self-improvement is not just about improving ourselves as people, but improving the lives of others - of being part of a support group that you help and helps you in times of need. However, we can become so caught up in our own lives that we let golden friendships slip by over the years. This can lead to many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserve. It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip, until we are aware that we prioritise the physical details of life in the wrong order.

For example, people on their deathbed do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible, but it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. It all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains we feel death is near, love and relationships. This becomes our anchor - but in life it is usually the other way around. And as a result of mixing up our priorities, we also may fail to realise until it's too late, that happiness is a choice.

When we stay stuck in old patterns and habits, the so-called "comfort" of familiarity overflows into our emotions, as well as our physical lives. Fear of change has us pretending to others, and to ourselves, that we are content. But the world as it stands today does not reflect contentment - indeed it is turning on the recurring themes of regret. If we imagine that the world is on its deathbed, then what others think of us should be a long way from the mind. Instead, we need to make ourselves aware that life is a choice.

It is your life. If you long to laugh properly and have silliness in your life again, as you did as child, then you can let go and smile again. It's said that a smile is a curve that sets everything straight, and it's true. With the tips this article provides, choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness, and in an uncertain world, anchor yourself with love.

Yours in love,